Plasma And Grilled Cheese
by Atrophy-Conception
Summary: What with three daughters, his developing relationship with Ady and his career in villainy, Gru has enough to worry about. It doesn't help when a certain orange jumpsuit wearing punk and his dad make plans to destroy Gru. Sequel to The Worst of You.
1. Revenge Is A Six Letter Word

I ran out of space in the summary. For those of you who haven't realized it, this is the sequel to The Worst Of You. It will be GruXOC (of course) and like the first story will also be about Gru's relationship with the girls and Ady's relationship with the girls and to a much smaller degree Vector and his relationship with his own father. Hopefully it works out all right. ^^

Chapter One:

Revenge Is A Six Letter Word...wait.

_At one point there had been a very large junkyard outside of the city. It was fenced off with high wood planks and barbed wire. People still got in, mostly kids and, as is usually the case, they got in because they weren't allowed. If the city had taken down the fences then it was probable that most of the break ins would have stopped. _

_ The young man would have still been a frequent visitor, however. Technically there were guards, but it was hard to be too vigilante while watching a pile of junk from thirteen year old boys who thought, at that age that coming back smelling of garbage with a stolen item that someone else had thrown out anyways was cool. The young man never had much trouble with the guards and in any case he wore dark colors and he wasn't there for trophies. _

_ He would root through the piles of junk, pulling out items mostly of various metals or he would take a broken electronic devise or pull the back off of a busted television and pick a few wires out of it. Then, when he had grown tired of digging through the junk he would be back over the fence with his findings. At that point he visited one of the junkyards around the city at least twice a week. He didn't have much money so it was the best way to get a hold of materials. _

_ This meant that he often smelled of the junkyard, and of course was berated for it, but by that point he was made fun of for just about everything else and therefore didn't much care about this. _

_ Eventually that junkyard was moved because people living nearby complained about the smell. They flooded it and built a beach, granted on hot days it still smelled like a junkyard and occasionally children dug up large metal items in the sand, which for some reason would become infested with tiny spiders in the late summer months and then, of course people complained about beach. _

_ By that point the young man didn't need to visit the junkyards anymore. _

XXX

The building was pure white. To the inquiring eye it almost resembled a large mushroom sprouting out of the ground and was surrounded by a massive fence mostly impenetrable and also pure white. The only color visible were on two large Vs. One on the gate and the other at the peak of the dome of the mushroom shaped house. They were orange. From there the eye was drawn to the large pyramid painted like the sky.

It was perhaps an impressive sight to the casual onlooker, but Perkins looked over it wearily before he stepped up to the gate. The top of the building unscrewed and a second later he was gazing into the barrels of several large guns.

"Who is it?" A voice said from a speaker by the door.

"Put those away Victor and let me in." Perkins said wearily. The camera atop one of the massive walls spun around and took in the husky suited figure.

"What's the password?" the voice insisted.

"If you don't open the door in the next five seconds I'm going to block your bank account." Perkins said with some impatience. There was a brief sound of disappointment and perhaps frustration from the speakers and then the guns were pulled back and a moment later the doors opened.

Perkins stepped in and headed forward as another door opened into a hall. This opened up into a living room. Again, it was impressive, with the glass aquarium underfoot, the large television and the sleek furniture. Vector's shark was swimming around listlessly. He had also apparently added a barracuda, which saw Perkins and immediately ran itself against one of the glass walls.

"I see your admiring my new addition to the fortress of Vectortude." Vector said. He had one of his guns spread across his lap and had his feet up on the coffee table. "The Barracuda. It has a very strong jaw and jagged teeth for ripping into unexpected intruders. Now I have twice as much deadliness in my deadly fish tank…unfortunately it keeps running into the wall for some reason," he added as the barracuda ran against the wall again.

Perkins scowled as he put some papers down on his son's coffee table, brushing off a game controller as he did. He sat down on the couch causing it to creak slightly.

"Are you still trying to find new villains? I already told you I can take care of Gru myself." Vector said after eyeing one of the pages on the top of the stack. "When I'm done with him he'll know what hurting is. Revenge is a six-letter word and that word is Vector! Oh yeah!" He finished the statement standing up in a dramatic pose. Perkins eyed his son wearily.

"Sit down Victor," he said. "You had your chance. You lost the shrink ray, you failed to get the moon and I had to pay a fortune to bring you back from outer space." Vector sat down somewhat dejectedly. "I don't get my hands dirty with this field work so I have to bring someone else in to help you." He said the last with little enthusiasm. Villains, worthwhile villains anyways were hard to come by these days. It was either old men, set in there ways, ways which were about a century out of date or young men who wouldn't know a work of true evil if it were tattooed on their forehead. He wasn't sure which type he was more tired of.

He was having the Bank of Evil reupholstered and his desk replaced since the woman in all the fur had destroyed it and also somewhat because he no longer had a partner and therefore could redecorate a few of the things he personally found out of date. Currently he was seeing people in his son's house.

Because of the amount of money the bank had lost recently he was turning down a lot of loan applications because he was trying to find someone who he could benefit from…as it were in more ways then one. Gru had lost him way too much money. It was time for Gru to disappear, but he didn't have enough faith in his son to do it by himself.

An alarm went off. Vector grabbed the keyboard beside him and pressed a few buttons so that he could see his front door. There was a young man standing there, examining the camera when it flashed on.

XXX

"Daddy…" a small voice cut into the realms of Gru's sleep, followed by a shuffling sound accompanied with tiny sounds of frustration and then some weight on his chest. "Daddy…"

Gru opened one eye. Agnes' face filled up his vision.

"What ees eet…Agnes?"

"I can't find my big unicorn." Gru eyed the young girl wearily for a moment.

"What?"

"Have you seen it?"

"Agnes…eet ees really early…we will look for eet lator, go…back to bed."

"I can't sleep without it," she said while pushing at his arm. Gru sighed.

"Sleep weeth one ove your other toys," he said with a yawn as he tried to turn over.

"But I want my unicorn, it keeps monsters away." She said as she grabbed at the t-shirt he was wearing.

"Eet ees just a toy and dere are no monsters, go back to bed," he said his voice muffled by the pillow.

"But what about the bed bugs and the thing in the closet."

"What are you talkeeng about?"

"You said they were there," there was a brief pause.

"I was lying." There was silence and after a moment Gru risked a look at her. He sighed. "All right, I will help you find eet. Den will you go back to bed?" She brightened up and nodded before slipping off of Gru's bed. He sighed and threw the covers off.

"Where deed you 'ave eet last?" Gru asked with a yawn as he followed his daughter down the hall.

"In the magical forest. We were having a tea party with the queen of the fairies." There was a long silence.

"Eet ees five o' clock een de morning, Agnes…where een our house ees dat?"

"It was in the living room." Gru nodded and turned the lights on in the living room, checking all of his trophies, including the iron maiden, despite the fact that he now kept it locked so that Edith wouldn't play around with it.

"Do you remember 'aving eet anywhere else?" He asked when it became clear that they weren't finding it.

"Well…the evil witch captured him and threw him in prisom…that's our closet…then we ate dinner."

"Ees he still een de closet Agnes?" Agnes watched him for moment with her large brown eyes.

"Oh…" Gru sighed and then picked her up and headed back to the girl's room. He put her in her bed and got the stuffed unicorn from the closet.

"Dere, eet ees liberated. Good night," he said as Agnes grabbed it.

"Yay, you're a hero daddy."

"Buh, great…" he said as he tucked her in. He headed back down the stairs to turn the lights out in the living room when the television flashed on.

"Oh, Gru, wonderful. The censors went off but I was expecting Kyle again. Since your awake do you mind coming down to the lab, I have something to show you."

"Uh, actually I was just…" he sighed as the screen flashed off and went to the Rhino chair to activate the lift.

When Gru descended into the lab Nefario was sitting at a table with a large beaker beside him. He was messing with the dart gun, which he had disassembled and was making adjustments to.

"What are you doeeng?" Gru asked with some hesitation as he eyed the gun.

"Oh, well, the poison I was using before had some corroding elements in it…one of the darts broke and damaged the whole thing so I'm looking into other elements. I was thinking about that incendiary juice. We've never found a use for that."

"So eef dere ees a leak een one of de new darts rather den corroding de device eet may randomly explode…"

"Well…I'll work out the details as I go along." Gru sighed.

"Ees dat what you wanted to show me?"

"Oh, no." Dr. Nefario said brightly as he moved from the table over to a computer. "Earlier this morning I received a notice for the A.C.E."

"What?" Gru said as Nefario began searching through the drawers. A.C.E was short of the Annual Commemoration of Evil, usually held by one of the major corporations dedicated to serving villainy. Every year they had sort of get together that was a call back to the days when evil consisted of men who thought islands in the shapes of skulls were a good idea usually on the birthday or deathday of a famous criminal in history. If anything it was probably a way for villains to keep tabs on each other and make sure no one had any plans that would spoil things for everyone.

"Something was faxed over a couple hours ago saying we should expect a formal invite in the mail," he said as he pulled a sheet out and handed it to Gru, who eyed it wearily.

"We never geet invited to dis…"

"I know, might be nice though, could provide us with some opportunities."

"For what? I theenk I am done weeth de whole collaboration theeng. De last time we went eet was a bunch of old men tryeeng to outdo each other by telling ridiculous stories, half ove which could not possibly 'ave happened."

"Look Gru, it has to be better then just sitting around inventing stuff we're never going to use or, as has been the case lately, fixing stuff that has nothing to do with villainy whatsoever. Would you at least consider going?"

"All right, I will consider eet." Gru said.

"Good, it would probably do you well. Spending some time around other villains. Especially since you insist on surrounding yourself with insufferable stubborn young women. Where are you going?" He asked as Gru straightened and set the sheet aside before heading back to the lift.

"I just remembered dat eet was thorsday," Gru called back.

XXX

Ady was sitting at the edge of her bed picking vaguely at the loose threads unraveling in the already prominent holes in her jeans.

She had requested Thursdays off so that she could take the girls to ballet practice. She had to admit that part of her still wasn't entirely sure why, particularly considering how much she disliked ballet and the company of soccer moms and considering that before babysitting Margo Edith and Agnes her only other experience was with her cousin's son, and that had only been the once, and he'd been bratty enough so that her cousin had actually instructed her to lock him in the bathroom if he started to act out.

She'd never really believed that she had much of a maternal instinct, because there had never really been much evidence of one. It wasn't even like she was starting to like kids. She still found most of them completely irritating. There was just…something about these kids…she enjoyed their company.

And then there was Gru. If ever there was proof that she probably needed some serious counseling he was probably it. There was no logical reason that she should feel anything but wariness and perhaps slight resentment towards him.

She sighed as she slipped her sandals on and pulled her hoodie over her shoulders. After she surfaced from her room she nodded at Vanessa who had her uniform on and was eating cereal at the kitchen table. It was kind of nice living with another woman…although somewhat ironic that now that she wasn't living with a guy she no longer had to worry about her clothes going missing.

"Hey, I'm heading out." Ady said as she pulled her bag over her shoulder.

"You want a ride?"

"No." Ady said, perhaps an instant too quickly. "I already called a cab. Thanks though, once I get my first paycheck I'll look into transportation…maybe I'll rent a car or something." She added, closing the door behind her as she left the apartment. It had been difficult trying to explain to Vanessa why she would take a babysitting job for kids she'd only known for a little over a month for free. Vanessa had mentioned bringing them by the Hideaway since the studio was so close. This was probably out of sheer morbid curiosity and Ady had mumbled some agreement that maybe she would at some point. She was a little concerned about Gru coming up in any form of conversation. She headed to the cab when it pulled up, her stomach knotting up slightly.

XXX

Gru opened the dryer and after removing a few items, frowned a little. His clothes were pink again. He sighed vaguely as he pulled out one of his once gray turtlenecks. He tossed it in the laundry basket before rubbing at his eyes and digging in the back of the dryer to pull out a pair of slacks, which he slung over his shoulder before picking up the basket and heading towards the living room.

"Hey, how many times do I 'ave to say to not wash de pink theengs weeth my clothes," Gru said as he set the basket down and waved the shirt.

The girls were watching a gratingly cute show of the sort that was meant to be for kids anywhere from four to ten, but in fact probably only appealed to dim-witted two year olds, although Agnes seemed to be getting some pleasure out of it. Margo was sitting next to her on the floor with her arm rested on her knee and Edith was lying across the couch with a tortured expression on her face.

"That's a pretty color, daddy." Agnes said brightly.

"Dat ees great, Agnes but I do not weesh for eet to be pretty," he said wearily.

"We didn't do any laundry," Margo said with a shrug. Gru pulled one of Edith's shirts out of the basket and raised his eyebrow.

"It was dirty." Edith said after being subject to both Gru and Margo's gaze. Gru sighed and eyed his turtleneck again miserably.

"Don't you have a couple of those?" Margo said.

"Dey are not clean," he said as he lifted the basket.

"Well, if your worried about what Ady'll think…I don't think she's going to care what shirt you're wearing." Margo said with the hint of a smile. Her father had been acting somwhat nervous all morning.

Gru gave her a sideways look.

"Dat ees not…I am not worried about…go and get your tutus on," he said finally before heading towards the stairs, handing Edith her shirt in the process.

He set the laundry basket down on his bed and began searching through his dresser for another shirt he could wear so he didn't have to don the pink one. She would probably make fun of the pink one. He frowned, tried to ignore the butterflies in his stomach and pulled out a button up shirt from the depths of one of the drawers, examining it briefly before pulling it over the t-shirt he usually wore under his pj top.

When Gru was dressed he headed down the stairs, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he did. Margo Edith and Agnes had also dressed and were in the living room. Margo was loading their bags with their ballet slippers and other items they might need while at dance class, including a small stuffed unicorn that Agnes insisted she needed.

As he made his way down the hall there was a knock on the door. Gru headed towards it. He cast a brief look in the cracked mirror over a display of swords, scowled at his reflection and then opened the door and met Ady's gaze. He smiled nervously.

That nervousness might have been reflected in her green eyes, but it was quickly replaced with a sardonic expression as she stepped into his house.

"Nice shirt, you know it's on inside out." Gru made a vague sound of frustration and began to unbutton it. Agnes ran up giggling and attached herself to Ady's leg.

"Oh…hey Agnes." Ady said vaguely as Edith walked up and yanked at the bottom of her hoodie.

"Hey, look, I've got a loose tooth," she said while opening her mouth and jiggling it.

"That's great Edith." Ady said while shaking her leg slightly in hopes that Agnes would just drop off.

"Look what I can do with it," Edith continued and she grabbed the tooth and flipped it around.

"That's really gross." Edith smiled, satisfied.

"It freaks Margo out," she said proudly.

"Would you uh, like some coffee?" Gru asked while he turned the shirt the right way around.

"We should probably get going. I've got the cab waiting," she said.

"I can drive you," he said as he fiddled with the buttons. Ady looked depressed for a moment. This dissolved into amusement as she watched Gru get to the last couple of buttons before his expression fell briefly upon realizing that he'd missed a couple.

"Having some trouble there, Gru?" He cast her a dark look as he started to undo them again. This dissolved into slight awkwardness as he attempted to sort out where he'd gone wrong.

"In the future you may want to consider sticking to stuff with zippers, you know…if buttons continue to be a problem," he didn't say anything, mainly because she'd taken a step towards him, towing a giggling Agnes and had lightly batted his hands away to refasten his shirt.

"I will just, geet dat coffee den…" he said, sounding slightly winded. Ady nodded with some embarrassment.

She stuffed her hands in her pockets and headed into Gru's living room to sit down on the crocodile couch after he went to the kitchen, looking sideways as Agnes climbed up beside her in her tutu.

"Can I ask you a question?" Agnes asked after a moment.

"Hmm?"

"Is daddy your boyfriend?" Ady froze for a moment.

"Uh…he's not…it's complicated…Agnes,"

"But you kissed him right…that's what grownups do when they love each other." For a moment Ady's face seemed to quickly flicker between a variety of dismayed expressions before it settled into embarrassment.

"N- it…uh…your uh…we're not…no…he's not my boyfriend Agnes," she said, her face coloring slightly as she raked her hand through her hair nervously.

XXX

Gru opened the door for the girls and Ady, shutting it behind him afterwards, he pulled something out of his back pocket, which vaguely resembled a remote control of some sort and pressed a button. There was a heavy thudding sound as various locks fell into place before he tucked the device away again and headed down the stairs.

Ady looked sideways at Margo, who was carrying all of her and her sisters bags and motioned for the girl to hand them to her. Next door, Fred was watering the bushes up against his fence. He beamed at Gru. Ady wondered vaguely if there was something wrong with him.

"Morning Gru." Fred said brightly while raising his watering can in a wave.

"Drop dead." Gru responded dryly as he walked past Ady to open the tank.

"Um…okay…" Fred said, momentarily nonplussed. After a moment he seemed to shake himself from this and set the watering can down. "Um, I was wondering if I could…discuss a small matter with you Gru?" he added while moving around his fence onto the sidewalk in front of Gru's house.

"No," he said while motioning for Ady and the girls to precede him into the tank.

"Well, okay um, maybe later then. It's uh…" Fred was cut off because the door to the tank slammed shut.

Gru always backed up into his driveway but he made a point of stopping when he got into the road and putting the tank into reverse. Fred watched glumly as his mailbox fell off of the post and a couple of the planks in his fence cracked before the tank pulled away.

Ady watched Fred out of the back window as he picked his mailbox up before turning around in her seat and frowning at Gru. He didn't seem to notice. She sighed and sat back.

XXX

Most aspiring villains of a certain age tended to get sort of odd ideas about the occupation and took on a flashy slightly gothic look, sporting skull belt buckles and fingerless gloves and eye makeup as they assumed villainy might be the ideal career to attract a certain type of girl. Most of them didn't last past their first heist. Perkins was in a fowl mood because he'd been seeing quite a lot of them in the past week or so.

The young man in front of him did not seem to be one of these, but at the same time was nothing much to look at. He was wearing dull slacks, a bit too short and by contrast a smoking jacket that was far too big. He had long dark hair but it wasn't a bit flashy. It was, in fact a little messy and slightly greasy. Despite the clothes and hair he still might have been able to pull the look off if it hadn't been for his complexion. He had really bad acne. In short, he was unimpressive…and this was almost worse then the flash.

"Well, I have your papers here. You want to apply for a villain loan. Do you have a presentation ready Mr…" Perkins said after a moment, now slightly discouraged, in the face of what would most certainly be another poor interview.

"Just Hugo please." The young man said before unrolling the pages he had tucked under his arm. They were covered in complicated marks and notes.

"I have been studying physics, plasma in particular. It is a state of matter. So far it's use in modern weapon technology is limited because it requires a lot of power to maintain, but ideally if I could acquire the money, I think I could build a working plasma gun." Beside Perkins, Vector scoffed.

"Please, science fiction."

"Not necessarily." Hugo said, somewhat annoyed. "All you would need is a small fusion reactor. I think I can do it…with a loan." Perkins cleared his throat and sat up, pulling one of the sheets closer and examining it.

"Listen, Mr. Hugo, upon reviewing your papers I notice, no prior accomplishments, no history, you don't even have a criminal record…really there's nothing here that particularly gives me a good reason to want to offer you the prospect of a loan…did you attend any schools in villainy?" He asked while lowering the papers.

"There's a school for villainy?" The young man asked after a moment. He kept trying to tuck his hand in his coat in an almost napoleon like manner and then, perhaps in realizing that he was doing so, removing it and putting it in his pocket.

"Yes, I mean it isn't compulsory, a lot of villains start off without attending. Still, it does help to shape people who…otherwise may not have the…spark of a villain into something somewhat presentable." Perkins saw the young man's eyes dart to Vector for a moment, once again tweaking one of his guns. He cleared his throat. "Given your inexperience I have to decline. There's really nothing about you that says villain to me." He said while looking down at the young man's papers again. Something seemed to catch his eye for a moment.

"In your family history…there's a listing for James Bandit? Is that the James Bandit?" Perkins flipped through the pages slightly.

In front of him the young man was looking at the barracuda who had run into the wall, floated dazedly for a moment and then had circled around and done it again.

"He's my father." Hugo said without looking at Perkins. His eyes had drifted to Vector, who to the outsider's observation appeared to be trying to stuff a fish into the barrel of a gun.

"Really, you didn't mention your family had a history in villainy. He was good…in his day. If I recall he had a thing for poisons. Also had the decency to quit while he was still at the top of his game…these days it seems like villains try to hold on until their blithering pathetic idiots. Your surname is different. I suppose he taught you a few things then."

"After my parents divorced I moved in with my mother." He said, tearing his eyes off of Vector.

"Oh…I didn't realize he'd ever married. Was she in villainy too?"

"She was a pastry chef." Perkins scowled and then sighed a little and sat back.

"Do you know anything about villainy? Why should I waste money on you?"

"I've studied villainy at length actually. I've been going over the acts and heists and contributions of major villains in the last fifty years."

"Well that's great, but I'm not interested in what's been done. The bank is only backing fresh ideas." He sighed again. Unfortunately word had gotten around about both Vector's misfortune and the bank's brief stint under new management. Perkins was becoming a laughing stock. He was beginning to suspect that this as well as the class of villain was hurting his chances at finding genuinely talented applicants. This kid, with his bad acne was, at this point the last interview he had scheduled.

"This plasma gun…do you have any experience building weapons?"

"Some, I was reading up on a few of the weapons designed by older villains and I've been able to duplicate some of them. I've also managed to build a crude model of the plasma gun."

"And what could building a…plasma gun do for the bank?"

"Well…it can melt flesh and cut through metal." Perkins raised his eyebrow slightly.

"Out of curiosity, the guns you duplicated, what were they?"

"Uhh, Pernicia's needle gun, she did that in the 80's…not bad, although the needles seem to be a poor projectile…they go through the target and a lot of times actually don't cause any significant damage and then there's Mallus' sleep ray…some problems with that one…he called it a sleep ray but he built it with a Carbon Monoxide emitter…so…the victims did technically go to sleep…they just didn't wake up again. Lately I've been working on Gru's Freeze Ray."

The piranha popped out of Vector's hand again and bit him in the ankle, which offered an interruption in the silence that followed Hugo's explanation.

"You've duplicated the freeze ray?" Perkins asked, trying to ignore his son as he pulled at the fish.

"Not yet…it's trickier then gas and needles."

"Please, gas and needles are hardly impressive, I design my own weapons…using brand new ideas…stuff those old relics would never think of." Vector said, after he managed to yank the fish off of his ankle and stuff it back into the barrel.

"No doubt they wouldn't." Hugo said blankly. Perkins scowled briefly at his son before returning his gaze to the other young man.

"Some might say that…some of those weapons were…not exactly breakthroughs…why not pick something…more impressive?"

"Well, I don't just duplicate them…I try to make them better. I found that if you calibrate the needle gun to shoot several at a time they're more likely to cause significant damage. The sleep ray isn't ideal particularly since you could just use carbon monoxide bombs with a similar result, but plasma is similar to gas, so I thought it would help me along with my plasma gun. Same with the freeze ray, I'm trying to see what he used to power it. Plus it's ideal as a non lethal weapon."

"Have you…studied Gru beyond this…little invention?" Perkins said, studying the young man's papers again.

"Yes…I did say I've studied some of the older villains. He caught my interest. When he first started out he did a lot of…fairly impressive things with cheap materials. Useful knowledge."

"Well, in light of this new…information. I think it's possible I may consider you for a loan, after all. However, we have lost a lot of money lately, so you must understand that we can't just offer loans out like we used to. I would like to see one of these weapons you designed, to confirm that you know what you're doing. I would also require a…small assignment completed in order to prove you competency. You see my son is undertaking a mission of sorts, but…in the past his performance was…less then satisfactory," he said while looking sideways at Vector, who's otherwise confident demeanor faltered briefly in face of his father's disapproval. "If you help him succeed with it, I'll let you have your money so you can build your plasma ray."

"What's the assignment?" Hugo asked, with some hesitation.

"I want to destroy Felonius Gru."

XXX

Later that evening, when they returned, Ady had noticed that throughout the afternoon a pain had started in one of her eyes and had spread to the rest of her head. She sighed as she stepped onto Gru's dead lawn and rubbed at her forehead. Edith and Agnes rushed out of the tank behind her. Agnes tugged at one of the bags she was still carrying.

"Can I have my unicorn?" Ady lowered her hand and fished through the bag for a moment before finding the toy and handing it to the smaller girl. Agnes beamed and bounced away.

Gru had exited the tank last, closing the door behind him.

"Listen Gru…in the future…I think I'll stick to the bus or a cab…"

"Eet ees no trouble…" Gru said after a moment of hesitation.

"Well…maybe not for you…but I'm thinking pedestrians will be grateful. As bad as cab drivers are in this city at least they wont run five red lights, cause two wrecks and they don't treat parking spaces as empty so long as they have a smaller car in them," she said before shrugging off the girl's bags and handing them to Margo when the girl reached for them, eyeing her father nervously.

"Eet could 'ave been a lot worse, believe me."

"Gru, you ran into a minivan at the dance studio and ran over the bikes that were strapped to the top."

"De bikes were not intentional…clearly dey were not secure."

"Well I doubt people strap them in thinking they might be hit by a tank."

"Fine, you can do whatever you want, but I am not goeeng to pay for a cab every thorsday…"

"Well if I still had a car…" Ady started with some irritation.

"Ady, do you want to stay for dinner?" Margo interrupted quickly, getting both of their attention. She raised her eyebrows at her father who straightened a little. Ady crossed her arms. Agnes, who had been running around in circles giggling stopped and bounced in front of Ady and Gru.

"Yeah, stay for dinner. Then we can play afterwards," she said brightly.

"I was goeeng to make filet mignon." Gru said after a moment while looking at her sideways. She shrugged, still crossing her arms.

XXX

Ady sat at the counter in Gru's kitchen while he opened the pantry and grabbed his apron. The girls had gone up to get changed out of their tutus.

"So filet mignon is like steak right?"

"Eet _ees_ steak. Eet ees taken from de tenderloin. And eet will 'ave bacon wrapped around it," he said as he began selecting the ingredients from the fridge. "Dere ees a bottle on dat rack, de 1980 Cabernet Sauvignon. Could you grab dat?"

Ady stood up and eyed the rack briefly before grabbing the bottle.

"De bottle opener ees een de top drawer." Ady opened the drawer and grabbed the bottle opener. A moment later there was a pop and the cork hit Gru on the back of the ear. After a moment he turned slowly to look at her.

"I swear that wasn't intentional." Ady said after a moment. Gru gave her a slightly skeptical look and motioned for her to hand him the bottle.

You're using this for the steak?" Ady said as she moved beside him.

"Not for de gurls. Dey will 'ave no sauce. Every time I make sometheeng een sauce dey will not eat eet." Gru eyed her briefly out of the corner of his eye. "I 'ave sometheeng for you,"

"It doesn't explode does it?" Ady asked while leaning on her arms and watching him place the pan over the burners.

"No," he said as he laid the steaks down on the pan and sprinkled them with salt and pepper. "I will geet eet. Do not touch dose." He added as he headed out of the kitchen.

When Gru returned he was holding a small box, he handed it to her. Ady eyed it for a moment before taking it awkwardly.

"So…it won't explode…" she said as he turned the steaks over.

"Eet will not."

"Or bite, or electrocute anything?" Gru cast her a dry look Ady hesitated for a moment longer before opening the box and staring at its contents. She looked up at him again, slightly bewildered before reaching back into the box and pulling out one of the objects.

"These are my shoes," she said after a moment.

"Sort ove…I am guessing dat dey were pretty much garbage even before Kyle got to dem…dere ees a lot of new materials dere." He said while his eyes flickered to her with a hint of apprehension.

She turned the shoe around in her hand and eyed the side amusedly. There was a G where the converse label was supposed to be she raised the shoe and gave him an inquiring look.

"Dr. Nefario does not break habit's easily…he was not…happy about doeeng dis."

"Shoes go beyond his expertise?" Ady said as she removed the other shoe with a smile and began to undo the strings.

"Uh…well…no…shoes are not really his theeng, plus he ees not…all dat…fond ove you. Are dey all right?" He added nervously.

"Yeah…thanks." She stood and after a moment that radiated of awkwardness she hugged him clumsily. She felt him tense before he retuned the hug.

"You are welcome."

XXX

Wow okay, so this took a lot longer then I expected for various reasons. I kind of lost my job unexpectedly because the owner decided to sell the place without giving us warning and I've been busy looking for another job and I also have a boyfriend now…so yeah…social life.

Also, I had to kind for drop one of the plot threads from the story because it was jamming up the whole thing and was giving me horrible writers block. It was kind of a fun idea but I just couldn't fit it in with the rest of the plot and things have been going better since I decided to omit it. Anyways, hopefully I'm on the right track now and this chapter worked out. The next one shouldn't take nearly as long.

This is also a working title. It may be the permanent one. It depends on whather or not I think of something I like better. Anyways, sorry for the wait. Thanks for all of your reviews on the last chapter of Worst of You. ^^


	2. A Lesson On Hostile Acupuncture

Chapter Two:

A Lesson On Hostile Acupuncture

_It was accustomed for him to be up late and because of it he was developing dark circles under his eyes. _

_He'd rented a shabby little room above a tattoo parlor, which was open at odd hours to accommodate the occasional walk in at 2am who'd been drinking heavily and was ready to make one more mistake before the evening was over. He could hear music coming from down below as well as unabashed laughter. Clearly it was a slow night and the employees were taking advantage of the time by having their own party, particularly unfortunate for anyone who might come in tonight. _

_ He yawned and picked up one of the many scraps littering the table, an old radio, burned out and also slightly melted. He eyed it for a moment before removing a few wires from inside. Directly in front of him was an ugly mess of metal and wires inside a body of what could only be called patchwork, made up of various materials, which were mostly some type of metal. An onlooker would vaguely be able to make out the lettering of a license plate even. He joined the new wires with a few already protruding from the monstrosity and then grabbed a soldering iron from beside him to join a couple things together. _

_ After this he pulled off the safety goggles he's been wearing and rubbed at his eyes. He pushed out from the table, pulling a chain attached to a hanging bulb as he went past and then sitting on the edge of something that was almost a cot. He kicked his shoes off and laid on his back, his eyes gravitating towards the window. _

_His view consisted mainly of a billboard advertising some sort of cream for warts, but there was also a sliver of the night sky and the moon, tonight, or this morning, as it were, a crescent. _

_ His weary expression turned into a scowl. They'd turned up the music; It was now loud enough so that neighboring apartment buildings could probably hear it as well. There was a crashing noise, followed by laughter. After a few minutes he sat up and crossed back over to the table. He picked up a screwdriver and eyed its head briefly before picking up some metalworking sheers as well and heading towards the door. _

_ There was a narrow staircase that lead down to the front door and the door into the tattoo parlor. The door was open now. He avoided it and instead opened up a door that lead into a storage room. There was a large circuit breaker on one wall. The young man began to unscrew the large bolts on the cover of the circuit breaker, blowing, with some irritation, the hair out of his eyes. Then after he'd removed the cover he placed the screwdriver in his mouth and raised the shears, eyeing the breakers contents briefly before picking out a wire and cutting it. Nearby the music stopped abruptly and the lights in the tattoo parlor went out. _

_ He spat the screwdriver out in his hand and replaced the cover._

_ They'd have to call the electrician tomorrow…again. _

XXX

"Ady," Ady was shaken awake. She mumbled something nonsensical and then blinked. Vanessa was standing by her bed looking alarmed.

"What, what is it?" Ady said while rubbing at her eyes.

"Your shoes are on fire." There was a pause while Ady decided whether or not she could have heard this correctly.

"What?" She said, now completely awake.

"Your shoes…are on fire."

A moment later they were both in the living room staring at the aforementioned shoes. Ady opened her mouth to say something before closing it again, at a loss.

"I just…got up to make some coffee and saw all of the smoke…I thought we left something in the kitchen on."

"Well there aren't really flames…" Ady said after a moment before she risked prodding one of the shoes. "They aren't hot."

"What are they doing?"

"I don't know." Ady said wearily.

"Should we throw water on them?" Ady shrugged. Vanessa went to the kitchen and filled a cup up with water. After a moment of hesitation she threw the water on the shoes. It made a fizzing noise and the smoke started to die down.

"Well, it looks like…" Vanessa started. She was interrupted when the shoe started shooting sparks.

XXX

Gru grabbed a bag of coffee from one of his cabinets and eyed it before his eyes moved treacherously to the box of instant coffee sitting next to his coffee maker. He frowned a little. In the last week or so he'd been trading out coffee that was actually…well coffee for the sad little tea bags. He wondered vaguely if he should be concerned about craving something that made gas station coffee look like gourmet brew. He placed the bag back up in the cabinet and opened the box of instant coffee with a sigh. There was probably something wrong with him.

After he'd steeped it in one of his mugs he moved to the living room. Kyle was lying on the couch. Gru stared at him for a moment. The creature was sprawled out in the center. While he eyed him, Kyle opened one eye and it rolled slowly towards Gru. Gru frowned and moved back into the hall and towards the stairs to see what the girls were doing. He hadn't seen them for an hour or so and when it came to Edith especially, he made sure to try to keep tabs on her in case she was playing with something that could hurt her or her sisters or his house.

He found them in the hall by their room coloring on the walls. He was aware that a parent was supposed to discourage this sort of behavior, but in an odd way he kind of enjoyed it and instead just limited them to coloring this wall…especially after that incident when they'd painted the house pink…

"Hey dad." Margo said brightly, pausing in the act of drawing a green butterfly. "Want to color with us?" She added as she raised a crayon.

"I will pass for de time being." Gru responded with a smile.

"Look, dad. I'm drawing one of Agnes' unicorns on fire!" Edith said. Beside her Agnes looked up from what she was doing.

"Aw," Edith had also drawn fire on one of Margo's flowers and Agnes' squiggles.

"Stop making your seestors drawings on fire Edith." Gru said as he took a drink from his mug. Agnes tugged on his leg.

"Wanna see what I'm drawing Daddy?" She said as she pulled on his hand. "Look, I drew Ady on the family tree." She said happily. Gru choked on his coffee.

XXX

A few minutes later he had returned with a bucket of soapy water and a sponge. He set down the bucket.

"What's wrong with my drawing?" Agnes asked morosely.

"Notheeng ees wrong. Eet ees very nice Agnes, you can draw hor somewhere else on de wall," he said. In truth the drawing was hardly recognizable and was mostly blue but Agnes had written ADDY underneath in her slightly wobbly scroll and, because that hadn't been enough, had drawn a line from Gru to her and a heart around her.

"Why can't she stay there?"

"Because dis ees a family tree and she ees not a part of de family, Agnes," he said as he rolled up his sleeves and dipped the sponge in the bucket. Edith was sitting on the floor watching with one eye covered by her hat. She exchanged a look with Margo, who was standing by Agnes.

"But I thought you liked her." Agnes said.

"I do like hor, but I would prefer…why ees dees not coming off!"

"I drew it in permanent marker." Agnes said. Gru's shoulders slumped and he rubbed at his forehead with the back of his hand.

"Why…would you draw dis een permanent marker?"

"We did all of the drawings on the family tree in permanent marker so they wouldn't get scrubbed off again." Margo said behind him. He looked at her and sighed.

"All right, I will feegure sometheeng out," he said while eyeing the drawing. "Go geet dressed and I will make lunch," he added.

XXX

While the girls were getting ready for lunch Gru headed outside to get the mail, ignoring Fred as he waved to him. He collected everything from the mailbox including a black envelope with a red wax seal on it. He turned this over in his hand. Up in the corner where the return address was supposed to go was just A.C.E in red lettering.

His attention was diverted when a cab pulled up at the curb and he straightened with some bewilderment when Ady got out, slamming the door behind her.

"Ady," he said with a hint of nervousness as she approached him. "What are you doeeng here?" She was holding a bag at her side, which she brought up and opened. Gru leaned back a little as a pillar of smoke rose from the bag.

"I don't know what it is you look for in shoes but I like mine to not be on fire," he tucked his mail into his coat and leaned in again and, eyeing the bag before carefully removing the shoes with his eyebrow raised.

"Eet looks like saltpeter."

"Great, why is it coming out of my shoes, Gru?"

"Dat…I do not know," he said before motioning for her to follow him back to the house.

"Uh hey Gru, hold on a sec." Fred said as he put down his watering can, while waving with his watering can."I didn't get the chance to talk to you yesterday." As he approached Gru's yard, Gru flipped the panel open by his door and without looking at his neighbor, turned on the electric fence. Ady watched Fred wearily as he jumped back when a burst of electricity zapped the watering can out of his hands. Gru shut the door behind them.

"Nice Gru."

"What?"

"Nothing, forget it. Saltpeter, that's like…the stuff you mix with sugar to make smoke bombs right?

"Yes…" Gru said carefully while raising his eyebrow at her.

"I used to make them and throw them in the hood of our car. It made it look like there was something wrong with it," she said with a shrug.

"You threw sometheeng flammable een de hood ove your car?"

"Says the man who nearly electrocute his neighbor. No one was ever in the car. It kept my mom from leaving the house sometimes. Can we get back to the shoes? They've been doing this since this morning. My roommate threw water on them and they started shooting sparks and making a loud beeping noise. I thought they were going to blow up or something so I put them outside."

Gru turned around at the sound of his daughters coming down the stairs.

"Hey Ady, what are you doing here?" Margo asked. She was holding Agnes hand.

"Oh, hey Margo, my shoes are on fire…"

"Dey are not on fire, dey are just smoking."

"Fine, my shoes are smoking and I came here because when something goes horribly wrong lately, it's your dads fault."

"I told you, I do not know why dey are doeeng dis." Gru said with some irritation as he headed over to the Rhino chair and pressed the button to activate the lift.

"I drew a bunch of stuff on fire, wanna see?" Edith said.

"No," Gru said quickly before Ady could respond. "Come on," he added while taking her by the hand and pulling her towards the lift.

"Hey wait, I don't want to…"

"Dis will not take long gurls," he said.

XXX

"Stay close to me and do not touch anytheeng," Gru said when the lift stopped. Ady crossed her arms and followed him, looking around uneasily at the thousands of little yellow bean men running around.

"So do you like grow these in a kit or something?"

"No. They were genetically engineered."

"From what?" Ady said while eyeing a couple of the minions wearily. There were two sitting on top of a beam apparently working on hammering a nail, although it appeared that while one was holding the nail the other was just repeatedly hitting him on the head with the hammer.

Dey were made from mutated dna, fatty acids and bananas."

"Bananas…"

"Eet ees Dr. Nefario's formula." Ady caught a couple of them watching her and Gru walk across the room.

"Qui wa sonoda?" One asked while turning to the other.

"Garufurendo, big boss," he said before making kissing noises. Ady raised her eyebrow. Gru eyed them uneasily before taking Ady by the arm and hurrying her along through a door that lead to an area with a small raised platform and a counter packed with beakers filled with liquids of a worrying. One minion was sitting at a stool at the counter playing with a gun suspended by the ceiling, which he was aiming at another minion with an apple on his head.

"Hey! Leave dat theeng alone," Gru said before grabbing the gun from Dave. The minion with the apple on his head sighed with relief. He was approached by another minion who plucked the apple from his head and took a bite.

"'Ave you seen Dr. Nefario?" Gru asked Dave while Ady watched the other two minions slap fight over the apple. He shrugged.

Gru sighed and turned, he nearly ran into Doug, causing him to shout. The large man smiled. Ady looked sideways at Gru who had practically crawled on top of the stool, causing the gun to go off, and disintegrating the apple in one of the minions hands. He gave Ady a somewhat embarrassed look and then scowled.

"I told you not to sneak up on me!" He said. Doug pointed towards a doorway on one side of the room before making a few other charades motions and then giving up when Gru just glared at him and instead motioned for them to follow. "Dat guy freaks me out," Gru said below his breath.

"Yeah, I know the feeling," Ady said while crossing her arms and eyeing a rack of guns of to their right.

The large man led them to a room with shelves of broken weapons. As soon as they entered a dart embedded itself in the wall a half a foot away from Gru, causing him to freeze. There was a low beeping sound. Gru cursed and tackled Ady before the dart exploded.

After her ears stopped buzzing and she got over the initial confusing of suddenly having Gru on top of her Ady blew a little of her hair out of her eyes.

"This happens way more often then it probably should," she said after a moment.

"Dr. Nefario…must be testeeng sometheeng." Gru said, slightly out of breath. He met Ady's gaze and colored slightly.

"Sorry," he said as he stood and helped her up. After a moment of hesitation while he tried to peer around the door to see if another dart was going to come their way he headed in.

"Oh, Gru, I was just testing the dart gun. It seems to be working remarkably well."

"Yes, I noteeced," Gru said while straightening his scarf.

"I don't know why I didn't think of something like this before…oh what is _she_ doing here?" Dr. Nefario finished with irritation after he saw Ady, who was brushing herself off.

Gru took the shoes from her and held them out.

"For what purpose ees dis happening?" Dr. Nefario moved around the counter and adjusted his goggles slightly.

"The smoke emitter must be malfunctioning." Gru looked sideways at Ady, who was looking both irate and slightly depressed again.

"I asked you to feex de shoes, not add to dem." Gru said with a sigh.

"It was only a few minor experiments. I didn't think she'd stumble on them to be honest."

"They started shooting sparks when we threw water on them, how can you miss that?"

"Well you aren't supposed to throw water on machinery generally."

"They're shoes!" Ady said with a growl.

"Yes well, I don't make shoes. I make weapons. As long as I have to repair a set of grubby sneakers for some…" he caught Gru's expression of warning in time to redirect his sentence slightly, "…young woman I might as well get something out of it. Provided you stay away from water and open flames and high altitudes they should be perfectly safe," he said as he began to search through a set of drawers. Ady was glaring at him. She exchanged a look with Gru who was messaging the bridge of his nose.

"Why would anyone…want dere shoes to be smokeeng, Dr. Nefario?"

"Well I thought it might be handy for escape. You know, in place of a smoke bomb, just a random series of pressure points and it'll come from your shoes."

"Isn't de point of a smoke bomb to sort of drop eet and run?" Gru said.

"Well sometimes carrying a pocket of smoke bombs is not an ideal method of escape." Dr. Nefario said.

"And leaving a trail of smoke is better…" Ady said from beside Gru. Nefario glared at her.

"It is purely experimental. There are other things I was testing as well, that are perhaps more successful," he said as he began digging through his coat pocket before coming up with a sheet of paper which he handed to Gru.

"A bug sweeper, a small grappler using tensile wire and a miniature rocket launcher." Ady gave Gru a dark look. He cleared his throat and set the shoes down on the counter before Nefario could say anything else.

"Please, just feex dem," he said wearily as he handed the sheet back over to Nefario.

"All right, all right, fine. I'll take it out. Waste of perfectly good technology," he grumbled as he set the page aside.

"Guess I should just be glad it wasn't the rocket launcher that went off in my apartment instead." Ady mumbled vaguely.

"Incidentally, you didn't happen to get that invitation yet did you?" Nefario asked. Gru raised his eyebrow and unzipped his coat to get at that mail he'd tucked away. He went through it briefly until he came to the sleek black envelope. He handed it to Nefario.

"Oh good." Nefario said as he undid the seal.

"Well, as fun as this is…I think I've had my fill of the explosions and yellow bean men, can we go back up now?" Ady said while eyeing some minions on platform above with what looked like a huge bomb.

"Hold on, if we are going to this, you're probably going to want to get her to babysit. I don't advise taking your daughters and we're going to be gone for most of the night." Nefario said, while nodding at Ady.

Ady blinked and looked around at Gru and Nefario.

"Okay, wait, what?" She frowned. A look of suspicion crossed her face. "You're not going to try to take over the world again are you?"

"I told you dat was not a habeet! Eet ees just a…geet together…for villains."

"What…like the Legion of Doom? Do you sit around coming up with ways on how to destroy superman?"

"It may please you to make jokes but the Annual Commemoration of Evil is a highly prestigious event."

"Uh huh," Ady said cynically while eyeing the envelope. "And when would you be getting back from this 'highly prestigious event.'" She asked Gru, who was looking somewhat embarrassed again.

"Eet ees held at night…probably not until three or four o' clock een de morning."

"Four o' clock? Can he even stay awake for that long?" She asked while motioning to Nefario, who scowled.

"All right, you know what…" Nefario started. Gru waved him off and took Ady by the arm.

"We weel deescuss eet lator," he said. "Come on," he added to Ady before motioning towards the door.

"Blasted woman…make her shoes explode next time, see how she likes that," Nefario mumbled as they left.

"So what do you do at a villain get together anyways," Ady said as they walked back to the lift. "Drown puppies, undermine charity, knock over mailboxes?"

"No." Gru said with some annoyance. "Eet ees more like…a deener, or banquet."

"So someone brings potato salad and you talk about who's got the biggest doomsday device?" Gru sighed heavily. He couldn't help but be reminded of how his mother made him feel in similar circumstances. What made it worse was that; minus the potato salad that really was, more or less, what generally happened at the A.C.E. Villains trying to outdo one another.

"Are you capable of goeeng more den five meenuts weethout being sarcastic?" Ady shrugged. "Would you like to stay for lunch?" he added as they stepped onto the lift.

"I need to get to work. If I babysit for you, do you promise it won't end with my apartment being blown up or anything?"

"Eet ees just a deener…" he said while looking sideways at her. She gave him a pointed look. "All right, I promise."

"Okay," When they got up into the living room the girls met them in the hall.

"Hey daddy, we fixed the picture so Ady's not on the family tree anymore," Agnes said happily.

"What?" Ady said.

"Notheeng," Gru said nervously as put his hand on her back and ushered her out the door.

XXX

Hugo had never been to the Bank Of Evil before. He'd been given somewhat odd instructions on how to get in. The front was a regular bank, which today seemed to consist of a middle-aged man at a desk and a very old lady who was carefully filling out a form. There was also a security guard sitting at a chair in the corner. He was asleep.

Hugo, without lingering for long headed towards the men's restroom and approached one of the urinals. He raised his eyebrow and leaned over slightly as a portion opened and scanned his retina. How did pedestrians miss something like that?

The wall opened into an extensive hallway, which appeared to be under some construction. At the end was a very high desk.

"I have an appointment. Hugo." The young man said. He was carrying a heavy bundle under his arm. A woman with sharp features nodded him in.

"Welcome to the Bank of Evil, Mr. Hugo." Perkins said, sitting back in his leather upholstered chair with his fingers meeting at a steeple.

"It's just Hugo," Hugo responded.

Vector was sitting in a chair next to Perkins playing on a handheld game system. This gave him a very 'coming to work with daddy' look.

"Did you bring an example of you experiments with weaponry Mr. Hugo?" Perkins continued. The young man nodded and unraveled the bundle revealing a gun that looked as if it might be dangerous just to hold it. It looked like it was mostly scrap metal.

"The needle gun." Hugo said before raising it and handing it to Perkins who took it carefully and eyed it with skepticism.

"Does it just shoot needles?" Perkins asked.

"One or many."

"What's the use of shooting one needle? That doesn't sound very impressive." Vector said while looking up from his game. Hugo motioned for Perkins to hand it to him.

"What shall I test it on?" He asked while looking coldly at the younger man. Perkins stood from his desk and walked around it. He nodded at one of the men on a ladder working down in the lobby.

"He's been painting that spot for the last hour." He said while eyeing Hugo out of the corner of his eye. The young man hesitated for a moment before raising the weapon, making a few adjustments and aiming carefully. A moment later there was a very faint sound, almost like an arrow leaving a bow, a little twang. Perkins eyed the painter wearily.

"You missed."

"I didn't miss." Hugo said.

"Well if you didn't miss then…"

"Wait." Hugo interrupted. The gentleman below, who was probably middle aged and balding set his paintbrush aside and started down the ladder. Or he would have, his leg seemed to give out, resulting in a misstep and he fell the rest way. The ladder and paint came down after him. "I modified them so that they're very tiny and it's too fast and too small to notice."

"Interesting. Another non lethal weapon?"

"Potentially lethal. If I hit someone in the heart, for example it'll do enough damage to be fatal…and undetectable. It would look like a heart attack."

"Impressive." Perkins said, and it was clear by his expression that he was impressed. It was a nasty creation, the sort of thing that made people uncomfortable.

Vector, perhaps sensing that he should add something put his game aside and picked up something underneath his chair.

"That's nothing. My new weapon, the Jellyfish Ray, fires box jellyfish at 85 mph up to 300 feet."

"Why?" Hugo asked after a moment.

"Box jellyfish just happen to be the most poisonous type of jellyfish in the ocean. Contact with them can easily kill an adult. They kill more people then sharks every year."

"Yeah, in the ocean. In a gun a jellyfish is a stupid projectile." Hugo said. He'd absently tucked his hand in his coat again. Vector made a brief sound of indignation.

"Oh like anyone's ever heard of needle deaths. There is nothing wrong with my design."

"85 mph is about as fast as a major league baseball travels, which is hardly enough to kill someone as it is without the projectile being gelatinous and in order for the jellyfish to actually poison someone you'd have to ensure it lands on them tentacle first. Also, in the ocean people may not have much clothing on, but they will if you're shooting at them, so in order for your gun to be at all effective you have to make sure it hits someone where they're not clothed, tentacle first at 300 feet at a speed that many people can dodge anyways." He said before turning back towards Perkins, who was watching his son with the merest fraction of dissatisfaction.

"Although," Perkins said before Vector could respond, "one important thing about villainy is that a certain level of presence is required. No one gets praise if it appears that their enemies have just dropped dead of natural causes." He said before shooting his son a stern look, indicating him to sit back down.

"It was purely experimental." Hugo said as he carefully wrapped the weapon up again.

"Well either way, I am willing to give you a…shot Mr. Hugo. Have you ever heard of the A.C.E?" Hugo shrugged a little to show that he had not.

"The Annual Commemoration Of Evil. An event that belongs to the old days of thinking if ever there was one. Still, it might prove useful. I pulled some strings and made sure that Gru was invited this year. I'll see you get an invitation too."

"You…want me to do something to him there?" Hugo asked skeptically.

"No, in any case it isn't allowed. There are regulations, otherwise everyone there would be constantly on edge. Besides, this is not my plan. You're the one being tested here. You're to pull this off on your own. I am not involved…if you get my meaning." He looked behind him at his son, who had his tongue sticking out as he continued to play his game. "Victor!" Vector looked up from his game and then made a sound of frustration when he was killed on the screen.

"Since my son is a full fledged villain, he's in charge," he said. Vector looked at Hugo smugly, who scowled in return. "The A.C.E is a relic of the past in villainy, but it might be useful for information. After that I'm leaving Gru's fate in your hands. If you fail this task, mark my words, whatever plans in villainy you might have, fail with it."

XXX

To those of you without an account or the people I didn't get around to replying to last time.

Past-The-Point-Of-No-Return: Hehehe good to hear it. I'm glad Gru's accent is working out, took a while to get down some sort of consistency with it and I'm always pleased to hear when people like my OC. Thanks for the review :)

Liloapril: Yeahh, it's kind of been a mess. He's a horrible businessman so he basically didn't renew his lease and then tried to sell the store. Moron. He was going to move everything out without telling any of our customers, but luckily the landlord gave him an extra month.

Anyways, enough of that, thank you for the review ^^ Ady is definitely going to have a hard time adjusting to Gru's character. I am definitely going to be focused on that.

The Fabulous Person: Totally forgot to respond to this review in a private message. Thanks very much :) I'm pleased that you like the story and I'm flattered that you care enough to review. I've heard from a lot of people that Ady looks like a boy when I draw her, lol. I don't really try. I guess I finally got over my habit drawing female characters too pretty and now have to find a happy medium. Hehe, yeah Hugo's not Dillon…Dillon's probably not going to show up ever again but I'm guessing if he did he'd make a pretty lousy villain.

So, the chapters are staying fairly short for the time being, but they're going to get longer, probably starting with the next one.

Thanks for your reviews and to everyone who added the story to their watch lists or favorites ^^

EDIT: Ooh, almost forgot. Early on when I was still writing The Worst of You, one of the reviewers Cary Meiers suggested that I have Agnes draw Ady on the family tree. At the time I didn't because I couldn't find a place in the story to fit it in, even though it was a cute idea, but I filed it away anyways in case I found a place. So, that was her idea. Normally I do not take ideas because for the most part my stories are fairly planned out and in any case I am slightly uncomfortable with using other people ideas even if they are made with my story in mind, but I thought it was cute. :3


	3. The ACE

Chapter Three:

The A.C.E

_A common thing for most kids is to come home occasionally with skinned knees. For her it was not unlikely to not come home with skinned knees, skinned elbows, black eyes, the occasional busted nose and on one occasion all of the above as well as three fractured fingers and a dislocated shoulder, but that had been a bad day…for one, she'd lost. _

_ On that day she walked home because she'd missed the bus. She spent the last two hours prior to that in the principal's office. They'd finally let her go when it had become apparent that her mother wasn't going to answer her phone. _

_ She'd worn a dress that day, with lace and bows. It was badly ripped and there were holes in her hose. One bow had fallen off, another was dragging by a thread and the lace was unraveling. Her hair had had a bow in it too that morning but she'd taken it out and thrown it out the window on the bus ride over and instead had braided her hair with some difficulty. It was messy and unraveling now and stuck up all over the place. Tears and mud streaked her face, but both were drying up now. _

_ On most of the way home she glared at the dangling bow, while occasionally looking at her fingers which she felt probably shouldn't be that color. _

_ Her mother usually got home about three hours after she did. Normally on occasions like this she would make sure to clean up so that her mother wouldn't notice, but both of her eyes were going black and her fingers were turning purple. _

_ Years from this day, she would remember it with bitterness, not because of the beating, or because she'd lost her first fight, or that she lost many in the next few weeks because of the fractured fingers, but because when her mother had gotten home, after her initial anger had subsided over her daughter getting in another fight and ruining another dress she'd said; _

"_You're disappointing," not 'you disappointed me' just 'you're disappointing.' _

XXX

It was the day of the A.C.E. Gru was in the process of making the girls lunch. Edith automatically crawled up onto one of the stools. Agnes tried to follow suit and couldn't manage it so she grabbed a hold of Gru's pant leg instead.

There was a stack of mail still on the counter. When Margo got into the kitchen she leafed through it briefly before pulling out a letter she'd spotted earlier that day. She had been looking out for it, mainly because she had suspected that her father would not.

"Hey dad." Gru looked down at her after removing Agnes from his pant leg and lifting her up onto one of the stools.

"Hmm?"

"We got a letter from the local school board."

"What ees dat?"

"Um…it's to make sure we're enrolled in school in September. I should be starting the fourth grade and Edith is starting first. Agnes'll need to go to preschool."

"School's dumb," Edith said while sticking her tongue out.

"Well…what deed you do before you came here?" Gru asked, experiencing that all too familiar out of his depth feeling.

"Miss Hatties sent us to a school nearby, but it's closer to the orphanage," she said. It was probably in another district anyway but either way she didn't want to go to that school anymore. It had been old and most of the teachers had been unpleasant and her and Edith had been made fun of for being orphans.

Gru frowned and motioned for her to hand him the letter. He opened it up and read a few lines before making a weary face.

"If you want to enroll us, you're going to have to go to the school and do it there."

"Why can't you just show up? What ees all ove dis proof of guardianship and emergency numbers."

"Uh…I think they have to have that stuff on record if something happens…"

"Sometheeng happens, what would happen?" Gru said, while looking up at her.

"Well, you know…if one of us gets sick or hurt or something."

"No, I don't like dat," he said while eyeing the papers again, this time with concern. If one of them got sick or hurt someone would pay dearly for it.

"It's just in case, dad…so that they can call you."

"We will talk about dis lator, after I get back," he said with a frown before putting the letter down on the counter.

"Are you going to be gone all night daddy?" Agnes asked.

"Yes, but I will be back orly een de morning before you wake up. Eet will not be any deeferent den de forst week you 'ad a babysitter. Lunch ees ready, seet down at de table," he added as he got out some plates for them. "I am goeeng down to de lab for a leetle beet to make sure Dr. Nefario does not get carried away weeth what he ees to be takeeng."

XXX

Dr. Nefario was getting carried away. When Gru got down into the lab he saw that the older man had gathered up a lot of their technology for consideration. He was also wearing a tie, which was rare for him. Currently he was holding a few small trinkets on chains.

"Well, I think I should bring a few examples of our weapon technology. How about the explosive key chains I designed last year. Destructive and they make great giveaways." Dr. Nefario said after Gru asked, with some trepidation what he was doing.

"Eef I recall dose had a habeet of failing to blow up when activated and most of dem melted."

"Yes, but I think I worked out those problems…they blow up now…of course they're a bit sensitive so…"

"No."

"Okay then, how about the new dart gun. That seems to be going well."

"Weel eet blow up?"

"It shouldn't. We should probably bring some of the minions as well, don't you think?" Nefario said while eyeing two minions who were fighting over a rocket launcher. One of them nudged the trigger and Nefario and Gru ducked to avoid the explosion.

"Well we'll just bring one or two…they cause less trouble that way…perhaps we can bring Doug…I know your not crazy about him but you must admit he's impressive."

"I am not goeeng to spend all night weeth dat guy breathing down my neck," he said while wiping debris off of his shoulder. He eyed one of his minions, who had put a wig on and was clipping bows to it.

"I am starteeng to 'ave a bad feeling about dis,"

"Well, I for one am glad we got an invite. This could be just the thing we need. Who knows what could happen."

"Makeeng statement like dat are not helpeeng. Why does your tie 'ave a teddy bear on it?"

"Oh, oops, just tuck that back in there…it shouldn't show. Unfortunately it's the only one I've got. Although I can't quite remember where I got it. You should consider getting a little dressed up too. Hey, what do you think about bringing one of the cookie bots?"

"I theenk eet ees a good way to be laughed out of de building, You can bring two minions, not dave, definitely not Doug and one weapon…and make sure to keep de weapon away from de minions…" he said bitterly, "and search dem for any of de gurls toys before we leave," he added before heading towards the lift.

XXX

Ady had spent the morning working at The Hideaway. When her shift ended she took off her apron and headed over to the break room where Vanessa was taking her lunch.

"I'm heading out," Ady said as she hung her apron up on a hook on the wall. "I probably won't be back until really early in the morning," she added.

"Why don't you just tell the guy to bring the kids to our apartment and pick them up in the morning," Vanessa said with a shrug. "Your doing this for free, he might as well make it more convenient for you."

"Er...no," Ady said carefully. She wasn't crazy about staying at Gru's house overnight, but the idea of him showing up at their apartment at four in the morning made her even more uneasy. Vanessa already was jumpy around the café when she heard a car backfire and tended to look up with some alarm every time the door opened. Gru was probably even more intimidating at four am. "I don't think…that's a good idea. I'll see you tomorrow."

She called a cab on her way out of the building and sat down on one of the chairs at an outside table to wait for it. She was a little nervous. It wouldn't be much different from other times she had babysat, just a little longer and Gru would be farther away. Still, overnight at his house, who knows what kind of horrors that would provide?

The cab arrived in about fifteen minutes. When she got to Gru's house, she walked past Dr. Nefario who was sitting on his scooter and shouting at a pair of minions who were loading stuff in the tank. One of them kept getting distracted and picking dandelions. Margo opened the door for her.

"Hey Ady, dad's upstairs getting dressed," Margo said as she closed the door behind the older woman. Ady followed her down the hall towards the kitchen. The girls were still sitting at the booth eating lunch.

"Hiee Ady," Agnes said before sliding off of her chair with some difficulty and approaching the woman. "Daddy made us sandwiches and he cut my baloney into a unicorn, look!" She said as she took Ady's hand and pulled her over to the table.

"Mines better." Edith said before she could respond. "It looks like a skull." She added.

"Very impressive…baloney art." Ady said.

"Dad said you were going to be here all night." Edith said.

"Yup." Ady replied.

"Are you going to sleep here?"

"Not if I can help it."

"If you want you can sleep in our room." Agnes said as she nibbled at her sandwich so that her baloney unicorn stayed intact.

"Uh…thanks Agnes…I don't think…"

"But daddy said there's lots of bedbugs and something in our closet."

"That was nice of him." Ady said with a sigh.

"He was kidding." Margo said as she slid into the booth to finish her own lunch.

Ady turned as the kitchen door opened and Gru walked in adjusting something on his collar. When he saw Ady he gave her a somewhat uncertain smile.

"You look…sinister." Ady said as she stuffed her hands in her pockets. He was wearing a dark turtleneck and his dress cloak. "Is that the traditional look for a villain pot luck?"

"Eet ees not a pot luck and what ees wrong weeth de way I'm dressed?" He asked with some irritation and perhaps a hint of self-consciousness.

"Nothing if you're planning on tying someone up on train tracks."

"Tyeeng someone to de train tracks ees a waste ove time. Dese days eet takes hours for de train to arrive," he said as he walked by her towards the counter.

"Not like when you were young, huh?" He cast her a dry look.

"We should go over a few theengs before I leave," he said before motioning towards the door.

"Didn't have a comeback for that one huh?" Ady said amusedly as she followed Gru into the hallway.

"I am tryeeng not to encourage you," he responded. She smiled at his back as he stopped by the door and opened up the panel on the wall.

"All right, dis button here at de top locks up de house. Dis one over here torns on de fence. Do not touch dese four," he said before shutting the panel again. "Eef you hear a loud beeping noise from de floor eet ees probably notheeng to be alarmed about."

"A loud beeping noise…"

"Right, eet usually just means dat part ove de lab has blown up." Ady frowned, slight weariness setting into her face.

"Does that happen a lot?" Ady asked.

"At least twice a week and dat ees weeth Dr. Nefario monitoring dem. De peeza place we 'ave been ordering from ees out ove business, you may 'ave to cook sometheeng…" he continued with a frown. "Please do not set my keetchen on fire."

"No promises…why is the pizza place out of…" her expression hardened a little. "It's because of you isn't it?" He cast her a brief somewhat embarrassed look.

"Dey stopped responding to dis number so I sent some ove de minions down. Dey got a leetle carried away." Ady rolled her eyes. He cleared his throat. "I will try to be back as early as I can. Uh, thank you…for de…babysitting…" he said. Ady raised her eyebrow a little. "Eef…eef you get tired dere are extra blankets een de closet een my room." He turned towards the kitchen when Margo, Edith and Agnes emerged.

"We're done…Agnes didn't want to eat her baloney unicorn so I wrapped it up and put it in the fridge for her."

"Deed you geet enough to eat?" Gru asked Agnes who nodded happily before grabbing at his leg. He scooped her up.

"Well, dat ees eet. I will see you tomorrow," he added with some concern. He was beginning to feel uneasy about leaving the girls for so long. "Call me eef you need anytheeng."

XXX

Gru wasn't on the road for long before he got a headache. Originally they had planned to take the ship, but while filling it up the minions accidentally grabbed one of the doctors spare containers of incendiary juice, which would have been extremely dangerous if they had attempted to take off, but fortunately started to eat through the metal before it was ignited. So they were stuck with the tank until the ship was cleaned out and repaired.

He was used to driving with the girls. Agnes generally would try to crawl on his shoulder and talk in his ear, Edith would be throwing things and poking people and Margo would be trying to restrain both of them. This was somehow more tiring.

Dr. Nefario was trying to explain the mechanics of the dart gun, which would have been all right if he didn't constantly get off topic and start droning on about something else, usually something he saw on the road since he didn't get out much. Gru had to listen to about fifteen minutes of droning about his digestive system after he saw a billboard for a fast food restaurant. This, coupled with the foreign chatter of the minions was causing Gru's eye to occasionally flicker uncontrollably. It didn't help that about twenty minutes into the ride the minions started playing the license plate game/

After an hour of this he made them all go down below and leave him alone. This seemed to improve the situation considerably. It was still a long trip, particularly because he had to make constant stops at rest areas at the doctor's request.

Finally they arrived. It took several hours even with Gru's irresponsible driving.

The event was being held in Las Vegas in a nightclub called Icarus, which was located underneath a dive bar called Upbear, which was very shabby looking and easy to overlook in a place like Vegas.

The minions were wearing weak disguises so that any stops they had to make would go, for the most part unnoticed. Gru headed into the bar, motioning for Nefario and the minions to proceed him while eyeing the clientele briefly. It consisted of one man who was face down on a table and another who peered at them blearily for a moment before turning back towards the barman with a shrug. He'd already seen a large man covered in spiders with a long mustache, a woman dragging along a giant lizard with a collar twice as tall as her head and guy covered in spikes. He was beginning to suspect that they were all in his head, particularly since they all went back into the very small room that had the pool table and soda machine and didn't come out again.

XXX

It was a nice day, so Ady followed the girls outside. She watched Agnes chase a butterfly for a while before Edith yanked on the bottom of her sweatshirt.

"I'm bored, let's play a game."

"Yeah a game." Agnes said, forgetting the butterfly.

"What kind of game?" Ady asked suspiciously as she pried Edith's hand off of her sweatshirt.

"Let's play fugitives." Edith said.

"What's a foogitive?" Agnes asked while tugging on Margo's sleeve.

"It's like a criminal Agnes." Margo said.

"I get to be one of the bad guys." Edith said.

"Can I be a bad guy too?" Agnes asked.

"No, you're too slow," Edith said.

"Nuh uh." Agnes said.

"Edith, let Agnes be a fugitive." Margo said.

"But she's so bad at it."

"I can be a good crinimal," Agnes said, downcast while looking up at Ady with wide eyes.

"You'll make us lose." Edith said.

"You can be a criminal Agnes." Ady said.

"We'll give you a head start." Margo added.

"Fine." Edith said bitterly. "Come on Agnes, try to keep up."

"Okay, so…what the hell's fugitives?" Ady asked Margo as they ran off.

"It's basically cops and robbers, except that she makes up her own rules." She said to Ady with a shrug. "We tried to play with dad once but we made him play a cop and he couldn't get the hang of it."

XXX

The Icarus was unlike other nightclubs in that it was more upscale; it was more of a lounge and resembled, in many ways the bank of evil. There was a clear indication that this was both a sinister and expensive place.

Everything was sleek but it could be argued as to whether or not it was tasteful or not. The interior of Gru's house was quite expensive and in many cases quite stylish but most people would have to agree that a crocodile couch was not the most tasteful item. The décor in the Icarus was much the same way. It was made of expensive things, it had a certain style, but an interior designer would probably cringe to see, say an expensive animal skin couch next to a table made out of a bomb.

This description could easily apply to the villains themselves as well…although in this case 'tasteful' was a word used very seldom. There was no end to silver skulls, spike covered shoulder pads, high collars, gaudy boots and tight pants.

There were pillars along the walls, all a kind of steel and about halfway up the pillars gave way to glass cases. Inside were a variety of strange looking weapons, chemicals, treasures and mechanisms, generally with a plaque explaining where it came from. They were historical items in villainy and some of them got quite old. Gru and Nefario were standing near a couple of these. Nefario was chattering excitably about a small machine that apparently caused an anti gravity field around it.

"This was made almost twenty years ago you know by Mad Dr. Schizo. It's where I got the inspiration for the anti gravity serum. Of course this is obsolete now, it only runs on a Macintosh Classic and it only ever created a field up to five feet around it, but at the time it was quite impressive."

"How deed he geet people to walk eento eet?"

"Oh it never got off the ground, so to speak. While he was building it he accidentally got caught in the anti gravity field himself. They found him ten days later floating around the ceiling. But it is a piece of history. Oh look at this," he added while moving over to the next case. It contained a vile of a strange clear liquid. The plaque read Phantasmagoria Serum created by James Bandit 1986.

"Well, well, if it isn't Felonius Gru," someone said, getting Gru and Nefario's attention. Gru turned with a scowl, reserved for anyone who would dare use his first name in public. When he looked at the villain addressing him his scowl turned to annoyed weariness.

"Hello, Dan."

"What are you doing in Vegas Gru? Here to steal the replica of the Brooklyn Bridge?"

"No, I was invited," Gru said wearily. Wrathful Dan was definitely a relic from the old days. Gru mused that if he was there, it was unlikely that the invites could have been too select.

"I still see your working with Dr. Nefario." Dan said. "You haven't dropped dead yet?"

"No, I certainly haven't," Nefario said.

"De last I heard you were training spiders to open bank vaults for you, how deed dat torn out?" Gru said nastily. Dan sniffed.

"I'm making progress. For example, observe my newest undertaking." He said while moving his black coat aside. A large hairy spider crawled out.

"You just keep dat under your coat?"

"Shush, now I'll have Artemis kill one of your minions."

The spider crawled its way up to Kevin, who eyed it.

"Ooh, kumo," Kevin said before picking it up and eating it. There was a brief silence afterwards. Gru looked up at Dan with his eyebrow raised.

"That was a katipo…they're nearly extinct…" Dan said distantly.

"Well, even nearer now." Nefario said while looking sideways at Gru. Dan opened his mouth to say something else his face twisting into anger, but a gloved hand fell heavily on his shoulder causing him to jump.

"Dan," The newcomer said jovially. "I didn't expect to see you here. I heard you were living in a nursing home in Ohio. Good to see you were able to get out past curfew to join us."

"Can go wherever I like…" Dan mumbled.

The newcomer was in his mid sixties with worn but tasteful clothes. He walked with a cane, but it was clear that this was out of necessity rather then style. His face was covered in wrinkles as well as a pattern of scars that went across his left eye and an eye patch that was a mixture of silver and leather. The oddest thing about him, at least in the context of the Icarus was his smile, which was friendly and went all the way to his good eye. It didn't seem to fit his face…perhaps he'd stolen it.

Nefario brightened a little.

"Bandit, we were just admiring this poison of yours in the case."

"Oh yeah…" he said, frowning a little. "You retire for twenty years and they put you up with the dead guys. Good to see you, Nefario, it's been a while…you look terrible. And Gru, I haven't seen you in…fifteen years it must be. The last time I saw you you had hair."

"Yes well, de last time I saw you you had better depth perception." Gru said dryly.

"Oh the eye, yeah well, there's a story behind that."

"I've heard there are several." Dan said from beside him, sneering a little.

"Oh well, you know how people get carried away with rumors." Dan scoffed.

"You started them all you old fool."

"I firmly believe that it pays to advertise…even when you're retired. So what have you been up to, Gru? I heard about the Jumbotron, I bet that gets a good picture."

"Eet blew up," Gru said with some weariness. He was eyeing the rest of the crowd in the Icarus. The first time he'd come to the A.C.E he'd been fairly young and early on in his career. He'd found it dull. There had been a lot of old men standing around talking about the past. He couldn't help but notice that things had changed quite a bit. For one thing he was the old man. This was somewhat disheartening. "Excuse me, plez," he added while heading towards the table with the drinks.

"We're in between evil plots right now." Nefario said when Gru had gone. "Things have been somewhat hectic."

"Money troubles?"

"Oh let me tell you about money troubles," Dan said bitterly. "I had two mortgages on my house before I finally moved into the nursing home. Couldn't even sell it either."

"Well your house was suspended two hundred feet in the air on steel plated spider webs. I can't imagine there's much of a market for that." Bandit said.

"It isn't money." Nefario said. "Gru's going through some kind of mid life crises or something. I want to get back to work but every time I turn around he's having tea parties, or going to ballet or playing dress up or something." There was a long, careful silence.

"That…doesn't sound like a mid life crisis." Dan said after exchanging a look with Bandit.

"It does sound like a crises, I'll give you that. How is he at ballet?" Bandit added, somewhat horrified.

"Oh, no, he doesn't do ballet, it's his daughters." Bandit raised his eyebrows.

"Gru has kids?" he cast a look in the direction that Gru had left. "I would have never thought he was the type."

XXX

They gave Edith and Agnes a minute start. Ady had her hands shoved in her pockets and was listening to Margo count under her breath. When she reached sixty they started looking for the younger girls.

It didn't take them long to figure out that they were not in the front yard. When they got to the side of the house, which looked out over the backyard Ady frowned. As bad as the front yard was, the backyard was worse. The lawn here was dead as well. Suspicious looking weeds grew in patches in some areas. There was a great hulking thing that at some point must've been a vehicle. Ady nudged something that turned out to be a bear trap. It was already sprung but she still stared at it for a moment.

"Okay…new plan," she said weakly after a moment. "I'm going to find your sisters and then we'll go back to the front yard and stay there."

"I'm not staying here." Margo said as Ady started back there. Ady turned towards her, caught her expression, weighed her options and then nodded.

"Stick close to me and don't touch anything" Margo nodded mutely and followed her.

"Edith, Agnes," Margo shouted as her and Ady picked their way through the yard. "Come on, it's too dangerous back here, we're going to play in the front yard."

"I'm surprised your dad hasn't gotten like, a citation or something for this place," Ady said while carefully stepping around a bundled mass of barbed wire.

"He has. He frames them and hangs them up in the den," Ady rolled her eyes.

"You can't catch me coppers!" Edith said from somewhere around the broken vehicle.

"Hey, I'm not playing around here, come on before you get tetanus or something!" Ady shouted in response before heading in that direction.

From behind the vehicle Edith nudged Agnes.

"Agnes, go be a patsy."

"What's a patsy?"

"It means you run that way and get their attention and I'll go this way."

"What if I get caught?" Edith shrugged. "I don't want to be a patsy!" Agnes added while crossing her arms.

"Fine, if you get caught I'll bust you out of prison."

"Promise?"

"Yeah, sure whatever."

After a moment of hesitation Agnes nodded skeptically and then ran out from behind the vehicle.

"Agnes!" Margo said before starting after her younger sister.

"Hey!" Ady said. "I said stay near me! Margo!" She started after them before seeing Edith out of the corner of her eye. The younger girl ran out from behind the vehicle in the opposite direction. "Aw, crap. Be careful!" She added to Margo before hurrying after Edith.

Margo was able to catch up to Agnes pretty easily. She made a grab for her arm as the girl neared the fence. Unfortunately she failed to see the bear trap Ady had noticed earlier. If it had been a set trap she would have been in a lot of trouble, fortunately it was now. Still she tripped and cut her leg below the knee.

Agnes stopped running at this point and returned to her sister anxiously as Margo stood back up and examined her leg. She hissed below her breath. It was a fairly bad cut. Still, Margo had learned a long time ago not to make a big deal about scrapes or cuts because on those occasions when she did get hurt it always seemed to upset Agnes more then her. As it was, the younger girls eyes were already welling up with tears.

"It's all right. It's just a scratch." Margo said weakly before reaching out for Agnes' hand. "Come on, let's wait by the house for Ady and Edith."

Edith had run to the only tree in Gru's backyard which was also dead and looked as if it had been burnt at some point. Even though it was late summer there were no leaves. It seemed as if it were a tree that even moss couldn't survive on. Edith touched the trunk.

"The tree's base," she said as Ady halted and stared at the ground at her feet. She was wearing sandals and although apparently grass and flowers didn't grow in Gru's yard he did have other things in abundance apparently. She experienced one moment of panic before looking up at Edith.

"Stay there. Do not move."

"You can't tag me on base."

"We're not playing anymore, Edith. Seriously, you just ran through poison ivy. Stay put." It was all around the tree and Ady was already standing in it. She moved towards the trunk and hoisted Edith up while the girl looked at the poison ivy with fascination.

When she returned to Margo and Agnes, she eyed Margo's leg. Beside her Agnes was crying softly.

"What happened?" Ady asked, alarmed.

"I tripped, it's okay." Margo said as Ady set Edith down at the edge of the backyard and eyed Agnes briefly.

"Is she okay?" Margo nodded.

"It's my fault." Agnes said.

"It's not your fault, Agnes," Margo said.

"She's right, it's mine." Ady said before motioning for the girls to head back to the house. "Come on, we'll get you cleaned up."

When they got to the front door Ady kicked her sandals off and made Edith sit on the step so she could remove her boots too.

"Go changed your clothes and wash your hands." Ady said to Edith as she opened the door for them.

XXX

Gru picked up a cocktail glass and eyed it wearily. The liquid inside was an amber color and there was a flower head on the surface. Unless he was mistaken it was a Nightshade and horribly poisonous. Gru set it down and eyed the other options. One was on fire and the other one was pink and had little white flowers in it. Gru raised his eyebrow and then picked up the one that was on fire.

"Excuse me, it's Gru isn't it?" Gru turned while blowing out the flame on the top of his drink, a weary and uninviting look on his face. It was one of the young villains, but unlike most of the other boys wondering around with leather pants and makeup and goggles that apparently had to purpose other than being cool looking, his clothes appeared to serve no other purpose then the most basic one. "I've heard a lot about you." Gru's expression didn't change; he took a drink and eyed the youth's extended hand with indifference. After a moment Hugo lowered it, unfazed.

"I've been looking into some of your work," Gru scowled.

"Hey, steeling de jumborton ees harder den eet sounds. Times square ees a very beesy intersection…"

"I was actually referring to some of your past work, like the art heist at the Musée du Louvre. You went there during the day and robbed the place from the inside and no one noticed until the guard changed. And you stole half of the displays from a National Crime Museum overnight, people still can't figure out how you did it. And you created a freeze ray without using carbon monoxide. A lot of people think that's impossible."

"Ees dere sometheeng een particular you wanted?" Gru said wearily.

"I just wanted to meet you. I've made it a hobby to look into the work of villains. I like to try to recreate weapons, figure out how they did things, but your work is very hard to reconstruct. Most people would say it's because half of the stuff you do seems completely idiotic."

"What ees your point?" Gru said in heavy tones.

"I'm not trying to insult you." Hugo said quickly. "I could tell you how half of this stuff on display works without even really looking at it, but I've been studying your freeze ray for three months and all I've managed to do is create something that can almost freeze water faster then an ice tray." Gru raised his eyebrow.

"Yes, well, good luck weeth dat," Gru said before heading back towards Nefario. After a moment, Vector toddled over to Hugo looking somewhat annoyed. He had caught the last bit of the conversation.

"Hey, fanboy," Vector scoffed, "What was that?"

"I just wanted to meet him, he's had an impressive career."

"Please, my dad says that he's been a villain for thirty years and only one or two of his plots have actually made money. Mostly he's wasted his funding and made a fool of himself." Vector said as he picked up a sparkling sunshine and swallowed a drink of it before grimacing.

"Did you place the tracking device on his car?" Hugo said. He was looking in the direction that Gru headed, but his gaze was focused not on Gru, but on Bandit. For a moment the older man met his gaze and Hugo looked away.

"Yup, we'll know where he is at all times with one of these babies tracking him," Vector said as he opened up his fanny pack and pulled out one of his tracking devices.

"That's a starfish."

"A starfish with an inbuilt tracking device."

"You don't think that's maybe a little conspicuous?"

"Well I didn't put it where he'd see it," Vector said. Hugo stared at him for a moment.

"You know that drink has white oleander buds on it. You just swallowed five of them."

Vector spat the drink out.

XXX

Margo was sitting on the edge of the tub while Ady soaked one of Gru's washcloths in the sink.

"I see he's got Gs on his washcloths too," she said vaguely before kneeling by the girl and cleaning her cut. "It seems like every time I play games with you guys something goes horribly wrong. Does that hurt?"

"No, I'm okay." Margo said. She couldn't remember the last time she'd actually had someone else take care of her when she got scrapes or cuts, definitely not in the orphanage.

"You guys have band aids?" Ady asked as she stood and opened up the cabinet above the sink. She paused for a moment and then closed it again carefully. "That's not a medicine cabinet."

"There's some in the drawer. Edith gets a lot of scrapes and stuff. Dad brought them up from the lab." Apparently the minions got bruised up a lot too.

Ady opened the drawer and pulled out the band-aids and after a second look grabbed a can of disinfectant.

"This is going to sting a bit." Ady said while sitting down in front of the tub again and pulling the cap off of the disinfectant. "You don't complain much do you?" She added, smiling a little at the younger girl who returned her smile a little. Margo watched her for a moment while she sorted through the bandaid box.

"Did your…mom used to take care of you when you got hurt?" Ady looked up at her briefly.

"Uh, no, no she didn't, actually. I usually did it myself."

"Me too." Margo said shyly. Ady gave her another brief smile.

"There your all set. Lets go make sure your sister changed her clothes then we can get some dinner started. That way, when it gets ruined there will still be time to order take out," she said as she stood and threw the disinfectant and Band-Aids back in the drawer.

"I probably ought to wash my clothes too," Ady continued as her and Margo headed towards the stairs. As it was she was probably going to break out all over her feet and considering how much Agnes attached to her leg she probably should make sure she didn't pick up anything on her jeans. "I wish I'd brought something to change into."

"Didn't you bring something to sleep in?" Margo asked.

"I wasn't planning on actually trying to fall asleep here, so no, no I didn't."

"Just borrow something of dads." Margo said while motioning toward his bedroom door. Ady eyed it warily.

"I dunno about that Margo..."

"He's not going to mind," she said with a shrug.

"I don't really like the idea of rummaging through anything of your dads,"

"What do you think is going to happen?" Margo asked amusedly.

"He put rocket launchers in my shoes Margo…I wouldn't rule anything out" Ady said as she looked at his door again with a sigh. "I guess I don't have much of a choice. I'll meet you downstairs. Make sure your sisters like, wash there hands and stuff."

Ady opened the door to Gru's bedroom cautiously. She'd only been in there twice. Once when she was being chased by that ballistic monster that he called a dog and once when that cookie had exploded. It was fair to say that on both occasions, she'd had other things on her mind.

Speaking of the 'dog', it was sleeping on the bed. Ady frowned and after a moment tiptoed in, carefully shutting the door behind her and walking over to the dresser.

She pulled on the drawer carefully, in part because she didn't want to wake up Kyle and in part because she wasn't sure what she was going to find in it. It looked ordinary enough.

Pants were out of the question; his waistline was too big. After some brief searching and one confusing moment when she pulled out a tie dye shirt and stared at it for a moment while her imagination did horrible things, she pulled out a plaid that she recognized as the shirt he wore to the dance recital. It was long enough so that she could wear it by itself, although it did give her a very 'little girl wearing daddy's shirt' look.

After she changed into it she gathered her own clothes up and started towards the door. She heard a low growl behind her, which made her pause.

She turned and eyed Kyle who was staring at her with one beady eye. Ady scowled.

"Just try it, dog," she said through her teeth. He seemed to hesitate for a moment. Kyle had a very simple mind. He was a ferocious monster, but it was easier to be ferocious when his prey was behaving properly. To him this meant running, acting nervous, screaming, perhaps trying to climb furniture.

Still he wasn't about to be intimidated by this prey. He stood and after a moment of preparation he sprung onto the floor and rushed at her. Ady jumped back, causing Kyle to run into the wall. Kyle shook his head dazedly for a moment before turning towards her again. Ady wrapped her shirt over her hand and this time when he went for her, jaw open, she grabbed him by the collar and pulled him away.

"Eat my shoes…" Ady said bitterly, while holding him still. Kyle tried to pull away frantically. Finally she let go and he ran to the other side of the room. After she left he peaked out from behind Gru's bed.

XXX

Gru was sitting at one of the many tables placed around the large interior of the Icarus. He was on his second drink for the evening and all it was managing to do was make him feel crappier. He was tuning in and out of the conversation, which seemed to be revolving around how villainy was better in the old days. Gru was eyeing the minions who had taken the blood orange slices off of the cocktails at all of the neighboring tables and were throwing them at each other.

"I think it all went downhill with the Internet. It used to be that if you wanted to rob a bank or some major corporation you had to make plans and study the place you were robbing and which wall was most convenient to blow a hole through. Now they've got these computer hackers who do stuff digitally. Where's the finesse in that?" Bandit was saying. He had a couple of deserts in front of him and was sampling from all of them.

"Right, finesse, that's what these boys lack," Nefario said. "You know back in my day, you weren't really considered a villain unless you had a bit of class. You could cackle like a maniac and wear a horned helmet but you'd better also be well spoken, intelligent and bilingual or know how to waltz or play the violin or organ or something."

Gru checked his phone. A little earlier he had considered calling home to see how things were going, but the reception was terrible. He finished his drink and sat back in his seat.

"The times are changing, gentlemen," Dan said. "If they had it their way we'd be up on display with these old relics. Makes me mad enough to come out of retirement."

"Dan, you come out of retirement every couple of years, what is the difference between you being in action and in retirement?" Bandit asked.

"Well, it's hard to be a villain in a retirement facility. The nurses there are demonic. I'm going to go see if there's anything up on the buffet that's soft to chew," he added as he stood up.

"So, Gru, heard you had a scuffle with Perkin's boy. He's a little twerp isn't he?" Bandit said after Dan left.

"He ees an idiot." Gru said before tucking his phone away again.

"Saw him wondering around earlier. Kind of hard to miss in all of that orange."

"I wonder how he got invited." Nefario said.

"De invitations can't be too restricted eef Dan got one."

"Oh, he had one of his weapons put up on display this year. You usually get an invite for that. That's why I'm here…I've been retired for longer then some of these boys have been alive. As for Perkins, the Bank Of Evil is co hosting. I imagine daddy got him in."

Even through his slight haze Gru felt a vague feeling of unease. Suddenly he felt like she should probably be a little more clear minded for the evening.

"I am goeeng to geet sometheeng to eat too," he said before standing.

"You know, I've heard a lot of rumors about your retirement…" Nefario prompted, after Gru had left.

"Well, some people will say anything." Bandit said, pokerfaced. "Actually, on that subject, I was wondering if you could help me. I've been working on something over the last few months, a sort of final heist, if you will, only problem is, I've gotten a bit old to do field work myself."

"I can't say I'd be much better."

"Oh well, I'm definitely in better shape then you, old friend. But what about Gru. He's still young…ish."

"Well yes, although we did just get done with a collaboration effort that turned out…kind of badly. I don't know that he'd accept."

"Well, I don't know that I'd call it collaboration. It's more like a favor for an old friend. I'll make it worth your while."

"He may be less likely to do that. Still, I suppose I could ask. I really would like to get back to work."

"You know, I always got the impression that Gru was like you, that retirement from villainy meant being dead. And kids, kids are tricky, it's hard to be a villain and a father, particularly if your kids aren't like you."

"They aren't even the worst of it. Lately he's taken to this girl, completely insufferable and half his age." Nefario shook his head.

Bandit raised his eyebrows with some amusement.

"Really? _Him_? How old is she."

"Oh, twenties or thirties. I don't know. She isn't even attractive and she's really unpleasant. Young women, nothing good comes from them." Bandit chuckled.

"Clearly," he said as he started on another desert. "You've never had one."

XXX

For dinner Ady attempted to make chicken and mashed potatoes with the girl's help. Well, mainly with Margo's help. Agnes had hung around her and Margo's feet occasionally pulling on the bottom of Gru's shirt and asking what she could do to help. Finally, Ady picked her up and sat her on the counter. Occasionally she gave her simple things to do, reasoning that she couldn't possibly do a worst job then Ady herself.

In the end it could have definitely turned out worse, she could have set fire to it, for example. At least the mashed potatoes were half decent and the girls didn't complain too much.

Shortly after dinner the girls changed for bed. Ady was practically pulled into their room by Agnes who found a little pink book on their book shelf and pushed it into her hand.

Ady eyed it while sitting down on the pillows by the girl's beds. It was called 'Moo, Baa, La La La.'

"Huh…insightful," she looked sideways at Agnes who snuggled up next to her and pushed her unicorn into her lap. Margo and Edith sat down on the floor as well. Ady looked into Agnes' giant eyes before opening the book carefully.

"A Cow says moo, A sheep says baa…" Ady raised her eyebrow. "Wow, this is going to be painful."

"Keep going, you haven't got to the best part…"

"Oh yeah, does this pig say oik?" Ady said with some cynicism as she turned the page. "Three singing pigs go la la la…oh…god."

After she finished the book, which really didn't take too long and didn't get a bit better, she closed it and eyed Agnes a little who had laid against her arm blearily. Ady nudged the little girl a little who buried her head further. The older woman smiled and picked up Agnes and put her in her bed along with her unicorn.

"Night Ady," Margo said as she crawled into her own bed.

"Night guys," she said as she turned off the light and left the room.

She started down the hall, pausing briefly at the Family tree. She'd noticed before that the girls had drawn themselves in. Now, off to one side there was a squiggle of a spotty looking person with messy hair in blue. Overtop that in orange were some kind of glasses and a few other additions. A name had been written underneath and scratched out and beside it was; Unkle Nefarrio. There was a heart around him. Ady raised her eyebrow a little.

She eyed her feet, in the last hour or so they had begun to get uncomfortable. They were also a little pink. She sighed and headed towards Gru's room again, in part because she really was getting tired and he had said the extra blankets were in his closet and in part to see about maybe borrowing a pair of socks.

She found the blankets in the closet, They were behind a large heavy object which, in the light looked very much like a rocket launcher. Ady moved this aside with care, her face carefully blank. While she did this Kyle eyed her suspiciously from one corner.

As for the socks, she had to discard a few pairs because Gru's feet were smaller then hers. She pulled one pair on that fit all right and then gathered up the blankets, pausing only to eye the books up on Gru's dresser.

There were six of them in stacks and they were large and leather-bound. Mainly what drew her eye was the exceptionally broad subject matter. There was one that said 'Explosives' another said 'The Encyclopedia of Inventive Weaponry' then there were two or three that seemed like textbooks on Space. These had names like 'The Solar System' and 'Science of The Stars.' These were filled with bookmarks and sheets of paper. The last book on his dresser was small and blue and was titled 'Are You My Mother?' with a picture of a clearly disillusioned bird questioning a dog. Most likely put there absentmindedly after reading it to the girls. Ady smiled a little and grabbed the one on the solar system.

She opened it to one of the bookmarks, which turned out to be stuck in a chapter on the moon. There was handwriting in the margins and small pictures that Gru must have added himself. After a moment Ady sat down on the edge of his bed, pausing to make sure she was sitting nowhere near the spikes. They were high enough so that they probably didn't get in the way of lying down, but they were certainly inconvenient for say, sitting up and reading, or stretching.

Her eyes skimmed down the information briefly. It varied between extremely complicated statistics and basic facts. One paragraph was talking about the tides and Gru had written something beside it in tiny handwriting that went down the side of the page.

It read;

_No moon means less pull on the tides,_

_The axis would destabilize, _

_Rotation speed would be unchanged,_

_The moon rotates around the earth once over a period of 27.3 days_

_If we take it while in optimum position we can calculate where it should be in coming days and return it to it's exact place long before any permanent damage is done. _

Ady raised her eyebrows before resting her chin in her palm. His notes were on were all over the place. Some of them were clearly about his attempt to steal the moon and these were, admittedly unsettling. There were a couple here and there that seemed without motive, however and she was drawn to these. She had never been very good at science herself, she'd majored in Literature, which was like majoring in being unemployed. It was clear that he knew what he was talking about. She wondered vaguely what Gru would be doing if he wasn't…well Gru.

Ady yawned and flipped the page.

XXX

Yeah I know…this took Waaaaaayyyy too long. I'm really sorry about that. I will try my best to not let it happen again, I've been really busy lately. The good news is I didn't lose my job because my boss was able to get an extension on the lease and he is still in the process of selling the store. Bad news is that everyone else already left so I'm the only employee so I've been working a lot. The owner has to work in his store now too, which is something he is not used to. I actually had to make a list of all of the things I do when I close and he doesn't know how to do anything. That and he's lazy and always late. It's been kind of a headache. The deals supposed to close on Wednesday but considering how long it's taken I'm not holding my breath. I may or may not work for the new people, but either way my hours will be cut back.

Anyways, hopefully the chapter turned out all right.

To those Reviews I did not already respond to:

Liloapril: Not so clever this time, but thanks :) And aww, you make me blush. Yeah, I may just work for the new owners. They seem nice…a little clueless, but nice.

Rmroxs: Why thank you ^^ I'm so glad to hear that and I hope this chapter did not dissapoint.

Crystal Persian: It was too much fun not to. I usually do not take suggestions, but pm me and we shall see. Thanks for the review ^^

Thanks for the reviews everyone :) I'll try to update as soon as possible


	4. A Mishap Involving An Errant Dart

Chapter Four:

A Mishap Involving An Errant Dart

Gru was eyeing one of the display cases. Inside was tiny spiked metal ball. A villain who had called himself Captain Evil had created it. Its purpose was to be a tiny spiked metal ball. Some people had very little creativity, although it looked as if it did, in fact serve its purpose well.

"Old Captain Evil, not much imagination…" Dr. Nefario said as he approached Gru. "If I recall he had an evil lair...shaped like his head, not very smart obviously. Certainly not a good place to hide out."

"Where are de minions?" Gru asked, with some apprehension.

"They're playing paper football with Bandit and Dan."

"What?"

"Well I say with, Bandit seems to be humoring them, Dan's just complaining because they keep hitting him in the face." Nefario cleared his throat. "They're using napkins…" Gru shook his head and turned back to the collection of relics.

"Incidentally," Nefario said after a moment. "Bandit asked if we might be interested in doing a…project of sorts."

"Project…" Gru said wearily.

"You know…a heist…I told him I'd ask," Nefario continued, not quite managing to keep the hope out of his voice.

"I thought Bandit was retired," Gru said.

"Yes well, you know how it is. It can be tricky to shake the habit."

"I am not certain dat I want to work weeth Bandit…" Gru said.

"Why? It wouldn't be like working with Polina. We know Bandit."

"Dese does not make eet better. How do we know..." An obvious racket going on towards the center of the Icarus interrupted him. Gru and Nefario turned towards it. Back at their table Bandit stood from seat where he had been sitting and instructing Dan on the art of making a football goal with his hands and headed over to them.

"Looks like a couple villains showing off their weapons," He said as he approached, setting his cane on the ground.

"What are they aiming at?" Nefario asked, while peering in that direction.

"I think it's the caterer," Bandit replied.

"I didn't think the food was that bad." Nefario said.

"You should have a go, Gru," Bandit said while nudging him. "Looks like a bunch of boys participating right now. Someone has to represent us veterans, eh?"

"Den why don't you?" Gru asked heavily. He didn't like being considered a 'veteran.'

"I didn't bring anything myself," Bandit said with a shrug.

"Ooh, we can try out the dart gun." Nefario said brightly.

"Are we sure de dart gun ees functioning properly?" Gru asked with hesitation while he turned towards the crowd.

"Shouldn't be any problems."

XXX

The A.C.E, at one point had been completely disorganized. Villains were often armed and they had big egos, so it was only a matter of time until they started to show off. The problem with this was that they were in a closed area, villains were impatient and they didn't see setting stuff on fire or blowing off a persons leg as a problem unless it was them who was suffering.

Finally, the villains who ran the Icarus decided that, although it rather spoiled the spirit of the thing, a little organizing was in order. So now there was a man with a clipboard. Showing off became a competition of sorts, although the only prize was to win. No one liked it very much and the unlucky villain who took up the job at holding the clipboard was usually sneered at and occasionally shot, but at least they didn't have to replace the furniture every year.

This year the man holding the clipboard was named Singe. He was not being shot at. This was mainly because, as well as a clipboard he was also holding a very big gun. He was also wearing spiked shoulder pads, which occasionally stuck people when he brushed by them too quickly. This ensured that people were now keeping their distance. He scoffed when Gru and Nefario approached.

"Well well Gru. I'll alert Vegas authorities and tell them that their novelty tourist attractions are in danger." There was unabashed laughter from nearby villains.

"Veery funny, we wish to exhibit our weapon," Gru said with some annoyance.

"Oh yeah…it's not going to be a tart ray again is it, only it'd be a devil to get out of the carpet," he said, to another chorus of snickering.

"I thought I heard a t, I didn't know he said smart ray, I fixed it eventually," Nefario mumbled.

"Eet ees not a tart ray," Gru said, while glaring at Nefario. "Eet ees a dart gun," he added wearily while he motioned for the Doctor to hand him the weapon.

"Oh yeah? Primitive. What are the darts filled with, apple juice?" This one got far less laughs…because it wasn't very good.

"Incendiary juice," Nefario said.

"And that means what to me?" The man said.

Gru, who had gotten tired of Singe, pressed the gun up to the man's throat. He wasn't going to be mocked by a man who wore spiked shoulder pads.

"Eet means eef I shoot you right now your head will blow up," he said, his voice low and dangerous.

"Oh, I'd like to see that, pull the trigger." Another villain said from behind Singe, who scowled.

"Shut up Magnus, all right, all right, I'll fit you in, take your weapon back. No random assaults allowed, not unless they're pre approved. You can have a go after Perkin's boy…just warn us so we can replace your target. The décor in here is expensive…we don't want lousy caterer splattered all over it."

XXX

_She was in his room standing by the dresser. There were the books; stacked up on top, although for some reason she couldn't read the titles. There was something else there too. It was sitting in a glass case, glowing faintly. Ady leaned in. It was perfectly circular and on a stand. It was the moon. She eyed it for a moment. _

_In its place in the case it was pretty, but it made her nervous. She ran her finger over the glass briefly.  
><em>

_ Out of the corner of her eye, she saw something flickering outside the window. She straightened and approached it, looking out onto the landscape. Everything was falling apart, the stars in the sky were rushing by like the earth was careening through space and there was an intense chill. _

_ She felt someone move behind her and a hand on her back and she looked up into Gru's face. _

It was at this point that Ady woke up. She must've dosed off at some point while reading Gru's meticulous writing. She jumped a little when she felt hot breath against her leg, which she pulled away quickly. It turned out to be Kyle, who had crawled up on the bed again and had fallen asleep. He opened one red, evil eye and gave her a look that said; 'It's not that I'm afraid of you, I just don't feel like wasting the energy right now,'

Ady sat up and closed the book. According to Gru's alarm clock, bomb shaped, or possibly a real bomb, she wasn't going to rule anything out…maybe it blew up if you let the alarm go off too long or something, it was nearing midnight.

She yawned and stood up. It was probably fortunate that she woke up when she did. She would like to avoid being caught in Gru's room, on Gru's bed, in Gru's shirt. That could get awkward.

Ady set the book on the dresser, grabbed the blankets again and headed towards the stairs.

In the dark, Gru's house looked menacing. Sharp things caught the moonlight, there were all kinds of strange shapes and there was even occasionally the sound of something moving. This turned out to be the Venice flytrap, which was industrially chewing on something. Ady didn't want to get close enough to find out what it was.

She headed into the living room and saw something else moving on the couch. This, upon careful inspection turned out to be Agnes, who had curled up with her unicorn. Ady raised her eyebrow and prodded the girl gently in the shoulder.

"Hey, why are you here?" Agnes squirmed a little and blinked at Ady blearily.

"I wanted a glass of water."

"Well you missed the kitchen."

"I can't reach the sink," Agnes said while curling up a little tighter.

"Why didn't you get someone to help you?"

"I got tired."

"All right, come on then kid," she said as she helped Agnes off of the couch and headed towards the kitchen with the little girl behind her, dragging her unicorn and occasionally yawning tiny pathetically cute yawns.

Ady filled her up a glass of water and motioned for her to precede her to the stairs.

"Wait," Agnes said when they got to the top of the stairs and handed Ady her half empty glass and unicorn. "I have to go to the baffroom," she added before heading to the restroom. Ady waited outside the door, her hands full. She ran one foot over the other, itching slightly. Her skin had gradually gotten more irritated as the night went on.

The girl surfaced a few minutes later and took her unicorn back.

Ady scooped her up and carried her the rest way while Agnes leaned her head on her shoulder. She carefully put her back into her bed.

"Could you check if there's something in the closet?" Agnes asked.

"There's nothing in the closet, Agnes."

"But daddy's gone, they might come out if daddy's gone."

"Really, because I would figure that it was the other way around." She stared at Agnes' pleading eyes for a moment before sighing and heading towards the closet. She opened it a little and looked inside.

"No there's no…what the hell is that?" Ady prodded something with her foot. "No…it's not alive, okay yeah there's nothing in the closet." She said before closing it again.

"What about bed bugs, he's not here to scare them away."

"There are no bed bugs."

"How do you know? Edith says that bugs crawl in your ears and hatch eggs innum when you sleep."

"Well they don't. Edith was lying."

"Can you check my ears, just in case?" Ady raised her eyebrow and then approached the younger girl. She leaned over to look in her ears. "Do you see any bugs?"

"No, there are no bugs in your ears Agnes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yup, no bug eggs either. Go to sleep," she said before starting towards the door again.

"Wait, what if a monster comes after you leave." Before she could answer, Edith stirred in her bed and rolled over.

"Shut up Agnes, you woke me up."

"I was just getting a glass of water." Agnes said while sticking her tongue out. Edith paused for a moment.

"Can I have a glass of water?" She asked while turning to look at Ady. Ady sighed heavily.

XXX

Mr. Perkins was at the A.C.E as well, but he'd spent much of the evening hovering around in the back, while occasionally grabbing a bite to eat or a drink. He approached Vector and Hugo who were at the edge of the crowd watching the caterer, who had been strapped to a chair and was looking very nervous.

"Everything going smoothly, gentlemen?" Perkins asked quietly.

"Well duh, what do you expect," Vector said in a much more ordinary voice, while hoisting one of his weapons up on his shoulder. Hugo remained silent.

"You're not showing that off are you?" Mr. Perkins asked after a moment while eyeing his son's weapon wearily.

"I just made the last adjustments last night, wait till they get a load of the Super Deadly Jellyfish Ray, do you like the name? I came up with that myself."

"Subtle…" Hugo said under his breath.

"Viktor, you're already a laughing stock, do you really have to embarrass me further." Vector's confidence faltered slightly but before he could answer Singe approached with his clipboard.

"Okay…uh Victor Perkins you're on. What did you say that was again?" He added wearily.

"First of all it's Vector, see it's a mathematical term…"

"Just answer him Victor." Perkins said with some irritation.

"It's a Jellyfish Ray, shoots box…"

"Yeah, okay," Singe interrupted. "Whatever it is, you're cleaning up after it." Mr. Perkins stopped him as he was leaving.

"I saw you talking to Mr. Gru. Is he participating as well?"

"Yeah, he's got some kind of dart gun that blows up or something, should be interesting…if it works…" he added as he headed off.

"This is like a competition." Perkins said, watching him go. "Informal, perhaps…but I don't want him to win."

"No problem, he won't have a chance after people get a look at this. Plus, dart guns are so old fashioned." Perkins eyed his son for a moment before turning towards Hugo.

"You didn't bring a weapon did you?" He asked. Beside him, Vector's shoulders fell slightly and he glared at Hugo.

"No."

"You came to a villain convention unarmed?" Hugo shrugged, his eyes on Gru and Nefario for a moment. Vector scowled and then headed towards the center of the room with determination.

"All of these relics are priceless, I imagine?" Hugo said after he left. "In the cases?"

"They're priceless to the old fools who put them there. Most of them were useless and a waste of money when they were new."

"I imagine in this place they get damaged a lot."

"No, a lot of the rules that are in place here are set up to keep them safe. Villains are very fond of their things, if these are destroyed then the person who broke them would have the Icarus and the original owner, if he's still alive after them."

"I have an idea," Hugo said before slipping away quietly.

As he walked by, he watched Vector, standing up in front of the caterer and adjusting his gun. Hugo shook his head while Vector attempted to stuff a jellyfish in the barrel much to the amusement and confusion of the crowd.

Then he quietly approached Nefario, who was standing near Gru. He had taken the dart gun back and was examining the darts he'd brought to make sure none of them were broken or melting or something. The minions were nearby playing patty cake and trying to pick pockets, which was not going well for them because most of the villains were wearing tight pants and in any case were not the sort of men who were easily stolen from.

"You're Dr. Nefario aren't you?" Nefario looked up from what he was doing.

"Who wants to know?"

"I'm an aspiring villain. I thought you might have some advice, seeing as you've worked with a few great ones in your time…of course, you'd be the genius behind much of their success." Gru, who had been glaring at Vector, cast a brief weary glance over at Nefario and Hugo before turning back and rolling his eyes.

"Kees up," he said below his breath.

"Oh well, yes, behind every good villain is a good henchman or evil scientist, of course." Nefario said. He was much more inclined to succumb to flattery then Gru. Gru was arrogant, but flattery tended to make him more suspicious then pleased. Possibly because he didn't get it very often. "You know, you look somewhat familiar…" Nefario added.

"You are an acquaintance of my father's, James Bandit." When he said this he looked around briefly to ensure his father, was not, in fact around.

"Oh, I didn't know he had a son…"

"We aren't exceptionally close," Hugo said, and left it at that.

"Still taking after the old man though, huh. He was good in his time."

"I intent to be better," Hugo replied, with a glint in his eye.

"He was a genius with poisons, do you share the same passion?"

"No, I've never researched poison's outside of remedies, I'm far more interested in physics and mechanics…and guns. In fact, I came over here because I had heard you and Mr. Gru were showing off a weapon."

"Ah, yes, it's a dart gun, but rather then putting a paralytic or poison in it, I've loaded these up with incendiary fluid. Originally I designed it to be consumed and react with digestive acids, but this is probably more useful in the long run."

"How do you keep the darts from blowing up before they're supposed to?" Hugo asked, his face a mask of innocent interest.

"Oh, I designed them with special materials, the gun's coated in inflammable and resilient metals as well."

"May I see it?" Nefario hesitated, shared a brief look with Gru and then shrugged and handed the boy the weapon after a moment.

Hugo examined the craftsmanship and ran a rough and calloused finger over the metal it was coated in, in a manner that to the average onlooker would probably not look suspicious or particularly significant. He then held it up as if he were going to shoot it, looking through the scope. Gru, who had looked away from Vector, because he'd shot his pathetic jellyfish gun, which had resulted in some damp shriveled thing hitting the caterer in the shirt and leaving a small slimy spot, felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up slightly as he turned and looked straight into the barrel.

"Be careful, there's no safety on that weapon." Nefario said nervously.

"Of course." Hugo said, lowering it again. "I've seen similar designs to this, is this based on Doctor Necrobanes dart gun?"

"Yes, actually." Nefario said. "Generally boys your age aren't familiar with villains like old Necrobane."

"Call it a hobby. Of course his were made of very cheap materials and he used poison. The art in this, I imagine is in the concoction you've put in the darts. I'm excited to see it in action," he said as he handed the gun to Gru, who was looking at him darkly. "It was nice meeting you," he added to Nefario.

"Nice lad," Nefario said, after Hugo left. "…he won't last a month." Gru refrained from commenting and instead hoisted the gun up. The caterer, who already looked a mess was taken from the chair and was replaced by a dummy made to look like an old harmless elderly woman.

"You are certain dat dees works?" Gru asked out of the corner of his mouth.

"Absolutely. I've tested it thoroughly…well…three times now, and it worked each time." Gru looked at him doubtfully before nudging his way past a couple of villains.

"Hello Gru," Vector said as Gru walked up to him. He glared at the young man. "My dad said you saved the world recently...was that before or after you adopted those poor little orphans, how precious." Gru looked sideways at a few villains who were giving him a vaguely disgusted look.

"Believe me, I am more ove a villain den you will ever be. And dat ees weethout daddy's money. Step aside keed, or I will test dis weapon's ability to blow up leetle punks een tasteless orange jumpsuits," he said before pushing the younger man aside.

When he had a clear shot, he raised the weapon and peered through the scope, holding it steady. He fired it and there was one long moment after his finger squeezed the trigger and before the chaos that ensued a second later when he realized, with some devastation that the aim was off…by a lot.

XXX

"All right," Ady said wearily. "You've both had your water and you've both gone to the restroom, and there aren't bugs in your ears, Agnes, no, I swear there aren't, I don't care if Edith said they were invisible. I checked the closet twice; the only thing scary in there is that pink sweater with the puffballs. Okay, so go back to sleep."

"But, when you leave the monsters might come out," Agnes said while tugging on her sleeve.

"Agnes there aren't..." Ady sighed. "All right, I will sit right here until you fall asleep, okay?" She said while sitting down on the stack of pillows.

"I'm not tired anymore," Edith said from her bed.

"No more talking, Edith." Ady said.

"Do you want to hear my unicorn song?" Agnes asked while squirming in her bed so that her face was an inch from Ady's head.

"No, no singing, just go to sleep."

"But it'll help me go to sleep,"

"Agnes, Margo is still sleeping, don't wake her up."

"I've been awake for ten minutes now," Margo said from her bed. She'd been listening to the exchange with some amusement.

"Oh, sorry Margo." Ady replied.

"It's okay."

"All right, sing your song, but hurry up and then after that go to sleep," Ady said before leaning back against the girls beds with a sigh while Agnes sang a song under breath that seemed to mostly consist of the lyrics, 'Unicorns I love them,'

XXX

Gru was in a foul temper on the way home. They'd headed out a little early, mainly because staying any longer had been unquestionable. It had been a test of willpower not to break into a run. It was bad enough the weapon malfunctioned, but what was worse was that the dart had flown straight into some of the cases displaying the villain relics. Some of them withstood the blast, like Captain Evil's Spiked Metal Ball Of Doom, as it was officially named, which was intact after the explosion but wound up stuck in a wall. Others did not.

The gravity device, for instance, which was activated in the blast and sent the tables of food flying up to the ceiling, and then promptly deactivated and sent them falling back down again with rather less ceremony and a lot more mess.

The worst was probably Bandit's Phantasmagoria Serum though, which broke, splattering several people. The poison wasn't actually deadly. It was a hallucinogen. Bandit's success with that one was that he had figured out a way to make it absorb into the skin so that he could wear it soaked on a special glove and spread it by touch. This resulted in a lot of men with weapons and spiked clothing thinking that giant metal spiders and purple elephants had invaded the Icarus. That had not ended well.

Dr. Nefario was dozing in the bottom of the Tank and the minions, who had stolen all of the blood oranges from the cocktails and shrimp from the buffet had been banished down there as well after Gru got hit in the ear with one.

Gru spent much of the trip glaring ahead of him. All he'd managed to do tonight was make a fool of himself and all he'd gained from the A.C.E was a feeling that he was old. The whole evening had turned out to be completely humiliating.

He pulled in the driveway at three thirty am and turned off the tank with a sigh. Gru eyed Nefario after he moved to the lower compartment of the vehicle. The old man was still sleeping. Gru scowled before shutting the door of the tank and heading towards the house.

When he got inside he kicked his shoes off. He hung his cloak on the coat wrack miserably. If Ady was still awake he wanted to avoid any further comments regarding train tracks.

Gru hovered in the doorway to the living room for a moment. There were a couple blankets hanging on the crocodile couch, still folded up. He raised his eyebrow and put his hands in his pockets before walking down the hall in his socks, peering briefly in the kitchen when he went past before ascending the stairs.

It was kind of odd, he mused to himself as he ascended the stairs, that when met with the notion of seeing a girl who couldn't possibly make him feel any better about himself, given her track record, that his initial feeling would be anticipation. He wondered vaguely where she was.

He wanted to change out of his clothes, but he headed for the girls room first. Gru opened the door quietly so as not to wake them up, then froze. The first thing he noticed was that Ady was asleep on the floor, resting her arm and head on the pillows by the girls' bed. Agnes' unicorn was next to her, as if the younger girl had placed it there after Ady had fallen asleep. The second thing he noticed was that she was wearing his shirt. It probably came close to reaching her knees, but was currently sitting mid thigh and the rest of her legs were bare apart from her feet. She was wearing his socks too.

Gru colored a little and resisted the sudden and bizarre urge to run away. His stomach did a brief somersault. Finally, when it passed he approached her in the way someone might approach something that could blow up at any moment before kneeling down. He went through a brief moment of panic when he reached for her shoulder to shake her awake only to notice the neckline of the shirt had fallen over it, exposing a cluster of freckles and her collar bone. He swallowed, his throat clicking slightly and then carefully prodded the covered shoulder instead.

Ady mumbled something incoherent before blinking in the dark. She saw the fuzzy unicorn first, which was bad enough and then eyed Gru. After a moment, when she realized where she was, she yawned.

"You're really unsettling in the dark, Gru."

"What are you doeeng een here?" He whispered, ignoring her comment about being unsettling, mainly because he was trying very hard not to look at her legs.

"I'm fighting off monsters."

"What?"

"I don't know," she said wearily. "Apparently that closet has monsters and stuff in it, so I'm here to make sure they don't get into Agnes' ear while she sleeps...but now that you're here it's probably okay…I guess…I don't know the rules." Gru helped her up carefully and they exited the room after he put the unicorn back in Agnes' bed.

"Uh, you are um…wearing my short…" Gru said when they were out in the hall.

"Oh," Ady said, remembering the shirt with some embarrassment. "Yeah, I had to wash my clothes. We were playing in the backyard and got into some poison ivy."

"What? Why would you let dem een de backyard?" Gru asked, his embarrassment for a moment replaced with exasperation.

"Well by now I should know better, but I wasn't expecting it to be a death trap. Margo got a scrape but she's all right,"

"Well eet could 'ave beena lot worse, de next time be more careful."

"How can I keep them away from dangerous things on your property? I'd have to like, lock them in their room and who the hell puts bear traps in their backyard, Gru?"

"Dey are to keep pests away…"

"Pests…"

"Squirrels, raccoons, stray dogs, gardeners…" Ady gave him a tired look and then headed for the stairs. "Where are you goeeng?"

"I'm moving my clothes to your dryer so I can leave,"

"Dees reminds me, why are you wearing my socks, you are stretching dem out…ow," he said the last when she turned, nudging him in the stomach.

"Because I walked through your yard in sandals and my feet have already started breaking out, I didn't want to touch them."

"Deed any of de gurls get any?"

"No, Edith was the only one who got into it and she was wearing those big boots…you may want to rinse them off." She added as she started down the stairs again and headed towards the laundry room. Gru watched her and then headed down the stairs as well before heading into the kitchen and searching briefly through one of the drawers.

After moving her and the girl's clothing to the dryer, Ady headed towards the living room. She sat down on the crocodile couch and ran one foot over the other again with some irritation. Gru walked in and sat down next to her.

"Here, geeve me your foot," he said while messing with the cap on a bottle. His voice had a gentle edge to it now.

"What? Why?" Ady asked suspiciously.

"You said eet was bothering you, I 'ave stuff to stop de itching and de puffiness" he replied. Ady eyed him for a moment and then hesitantly swung her leg onto the couch. She watched him with some fascination as he removed the sock, and began rubbing the cream over the top of her foot.

"Uh, should you be um…I mean won't you get it…"

"I know how to prevent eet," he said, as his eyes flashed briefly up her leg and then back quickly. He colored a little. "I am sorry about de poison ivy," he added after a moment. "I will try to clear eet up."

Ady was quiet. Sometimes she didn't know how to react to him when he was being reasonable. Instead she watched his slender fingers, moving over her now slightly pink feet. She'd never liked her feet much. When she was younger she almost never wore sandals or went barefoot. She didn't care quite as much now, but she was still slightly embarrassed at his attention.

"How was you're evil potluck thing?" Ady asked after a moment, mainly because she was starting to feel awkward.

"Do not ask," he said darkly. "Geeve me your other foot." She adjusted her position slightly, pulling the oversized shirt over her legs.

"You're fingernails are like, perfect. Do you get manicures or something…"

"No," Gru said heavily. "I just do not chew on my nails," he added while nodding to her hands resting on her legs.

"I wouldn't make fun of me with both of my feet in your lap, Gru." They were both silent for a while. Gru's eyes kept returning to her legs and her shoulders. He was trying to think of something to say, preferably something that wouldn't result in a snappy comeback from her, but he wasn't all that good with flirtatious conversation. Desperate for something, he just fell back on the first thing he could think of.

"Uhh, do you speak Spanish?" He said, and automatically felt stupid.

"No, what? Why?" Ady asked.

"I uh, was just goieeng to...I mean eef I...notheeng, forget eet," he said, blushing.

"Hey Gru," Ady said quietly.

"Hmm…"

"Is there enough cream on my feet yet?"

"Oh, yes, sorry." He said while letting go of her feet. Ady gave him a slightly puzzled smile and withdrew them from his lap. He stood from the couch and headed towards the kitchen to put the cream away.

Ady sat on the couch for a moment longer. She eyed her feet, wiggling her toes a little and then stood and followed him.

"So how do you prevent breaking out all over your hands?" Ady asked after she entered the kitchen and leaned against the counter.

"Rubbeeng alcohol, hot water and den soap and water…eet should be fine, de rash ees not contagious anyway. Eet's just de oils een de plant…Eef dere was any on your feet eet probably rubbed off on de socks."

"You've gotten poison ivy a lot?"

"A few times, yes," Gru said while looking up at her and grabbing some rubbing alcohol from under the sink. She watched him for a moment then surprised him by taking his slender hands. Gru looked up at her as she took the cloth from him and ran it over his hands.

"Here, I don't want you to break a nail," Ady said, by way of an explanation, while coloring slightly.

"Would you like some breakfast?" Gru asked after a moment, ignoring her comment. His fingers were tingling.

"It's four in the morning."

"I 'ave not eaten much…de caterer at de A.C.E was tied to a chair and shot at and most of de food wound up on de ceiling."

"Okay what…no, never mind. I don't want to know, what did you have in mind?" She added.

"Pancakes?" She looked up at him and smiled a little before nodding. Gru rinsed his hands off and then began to get out stuff for pancakes.

"Strawberry?" He said after eyeing the contents of his fridge.

"I'm allergic, I don't need any more of a rash,"

"I 'ave chocolate cheeps and I 'ave de blueberries."

"What's a cheep?" Ady said. Gru raised his head with a dry look before grabbing the blueberries. He pulled his apron from its place on the hook and pulled it over his head before getting started on the pancakes.

"Here, let me help." Ady said as she pulled the large bowl he'd said aside towards her. He gave her a doubtful look. "I'm not going to mess it up, just tell me what to do." She said.

"All right, you can meex de ingredients. Eet ees very hard to burn dat,"

She started adding ingredients into the bowl at Gru's instruction. He sat on one of the stools at the counter as she did and watched her amusedly as she stirred each of the ingredients in.

"You 'ave very leetle finesse…are you capable of not makeeng a mess?" He said after a while.

"I didn't know you needed finesse to make pancakes, besides what fun is cooking in your kitchen if I can't make a mess?" Ady said. He stood, taking off his apron. Ady blinked as swung it over her shoulders. "Will the apron give me finesse Gru?" She asked as she felt his fingers working at tying the knot at the back.

"I doubt eet. Eet may keep you from geeting anytheeng else on my short."

After she finished making the batter Gru poured some of it over a large pan, she peered around his arm.

"Is that biohazard symbol? Not the most appetizing shape for a pancake…how the hell do you do that?" She added as he finished the design.

"Eet ees not deeficult."

"Baloney and pancake art. That's an odd talent Gru." He pulled the pan off of the burner and, because at this point he was trying to impress her, flipped the pancake over in the air and attempted to catch it behind his back. Unfortunately because he was already having an off night, it landed on the floor.

"Do not say a word," Gru said as he poured more batter into the pan and tried not to look at her. He glared at her when he heard the start of a chuckle.

"Well, you try eet den..."he said bitterly.

"Mkay, does it have to land on the floor or am I allowed to get it into the pan?" Gru didn't answer.

After the pancakes were done they sat down to eat. Outside the sky was starting to glow with early morning light.

XXX

Okay, so I figured I'd update earlier then usual this time to make up for how late the last chapter was. Hope this turned out all right. Thanks for the reviews and faves and stuff :)

Liloapril: I'm glad Ady has come together as a character, always a good thing to hear. Yeah, the villain get together was fun to write, although I admit some inspiration was drawn from reading a lot of Terry Pratchett. Glad you liked the chapter and thanks for the review :3


	5. A Parent's Guide To Enrollment

Chapter Five:

A Parent's Guide To Enrollment: What Not To Do

_The fourteen-year-old boy knelt down on the sidewalk, picking up all that remained of what had been a working rocket engine. Occasionally he sniffed, not because he was crying, although there had been one or two close calls, but because his nose was bleeding. He was pretty sure he had a black eye as well. It wasn't even as if he still wore the box on his head. _

_He finally gathered up all he could and made the slow walk home. It had taken forever to gather everything to build the engine and he wasn't about to leave it behind on the sidewalk just because the world happened to be tinted slightly purple at the moment. He walked awkwardly down the sidewalk in one dress shoe. They'd taken the other one._

_ When he got home he went to the living room where his mother was sitting and reading a magazine. He stood in the doorway for a moment, his arms still full. _

_ "Sorry I am late, mom," he said quietly._

_ "You're late?" His mother responded, not looking up from her magazine. _

_ "…I am usually back at three thorty." _

_ "Eh, I didn't notice." _

_ "Eet ees six," he added reproachfully. She finally looked up at him. _

_ "I see you managed to get your butt kicked again," he scowled and headed for the stairs. _

_After cleaning himself up he went to his room and began sorting through the parts of the engine to see what was still salvageable. _

_ He pulled a sheet of paper towards him and made a few notes about some of the missing pieces, and then he sat back against his chair. _

_ He was feeling angry and frustrated. Because of this there wasn't much room for sadness or hurt, so at least that was something to be thankful for. He had worked on that engine for months. It was nearly impossible to get the materials to build it and those idiots had wrecked it in the course of an afternoon. _

_He stared at the scraps on the surface of his desk for a while before he finally straightened and started writing. _

_Most of the pieces were still there. Originally he had intended it to be for a miniature spacecraft. He'd gotten really close; maybe even close enough so that if he could find a way to build the craft itself he could send it off. Obviously it wouldn't get as far as the moon, but it would have been a very interesting experiment. _

_Now he was thinking about something else. Rocket engines didn't just propel spacecrafts, they propelled missiles as well. _

XXX

Hugo was sitting on Vector's couch, staring down at the glass floor. His eyes were moving back and forth between the shark and the barracuda. The shark seemed to freak out whenever it came to close to the top of the glass and saw him, or the other giant fish, or his own reflection. The barracuda kept running into walls.

"What is wrong with the fish in your aquarium?" He asked. Vector had delayed their meeting so that he could finish a level on his game. In any case Mr. Perkins had yet to arrive as he was dealing with matters at the Bank of Evil.

"Nothing, they're perfect specimens of vicious man eating carnivores." Vector said, not looking away from the screen. He was beginning to get very irritated by Hugo. His father seemed impressed by the young man, particularly after the A.C.E. Apparently he'd managed to adjust Gru's weapon enough to completely screw up the aim without the older man noticing.

Perkins was not often impressed by much…or, at least he wasn't often impressed by Vector. He'd mentioned that Hugo might have been a little more careful next time but, in truth, Perkins hadn't really cared about the artifacts in the displays, nor the chaos caused by breaking them. He wasn't a fan of the old days in villainy and the Icarus preserved it like a museum, so in his eyes, there was no _real _downside to Hugo's actions. Vector was beginning to think it was time to take this Hugo guy down a few pegs.

"Are they brain damaged?" Hugo continued, unaware of the other man's thoughts.

"No," Vector said with a disdainful snort. "They're not brain damaged. They're just…restless," he said as the barracuda ran into the wall again. In fact he wasn't sure if maybe that thing was brain damaged. He'd looked stuff up to see why it kept running into walls and saw that it was naturally attracted to shiny things…which might account to why the glass surface enticed it, but still he felt that it really should be catching on by this point. As for the shark…well, he hadn't quite been the same since Gru punched him in the face.

A brief alarm went off. Vector hit a few buttons to turn on the cameras and opened the doors when they showed his father at the gate.

XXX

Ady woke up with a yawn and after a moment of trying to decide whether or not she wanted to burrow back into her pillow, finally rolled out of bed. The apartment that Vanessa and her were currently sharing was a lot better then her last place. Although, there were probably a lot of places that were better then her last apartment.

It was a duplex, with an upstairs and downstairs and even a yard and mini porch, wood floors, a full kitchen and even a basement. The fact that it didn't have rats was also a plus.

She headed down the narrow stairs and raised her hand blearily at Vanessa who was drinking coffee and watching a small tv set on top of a fireplace that had long ago been covered up and was now just a gaudy decoration.

"Morning," she said as she poured herself a cup of coffee as well and headed over to the couch, removing an article of clothing that was draped across her seat. "What's with the giant sweatshirt?"

"Oh, it's Mark's. He's going through a baggy clothes phase." Vanessa said as she picked it up and tossed it onto a nearby chair. Mark was Vanessa's boyfriend. He occasionally stayed over at their apartment. Sometimes she went over to his. Ady didn't really invest too much of an opinion in other people's relationships considering how pathetic most of her had turned out, but she wondered sometimes if Mark was very bright. "All of his clothes are two or three sizes too big. Yesterday his pants fell off three times." Vanessa continued.

"Classy. Still, I guess it's better then having a boyfriend who borrows your clothes," Ady said as she took a drink of her coffee.

"Yeah…that's…not really a normal thing though Ady. Hey, speaking of boyfriends, Mark has a friend and I was wondering if you…"

"No…" Ady interrupted quickly.

"It doesn't have to be a serious date or anything. We were just going out on Saturday…it could just be a casual thing, you know…if you want to come."

"I don't think so, Vanessa."

"Still too soon? I know you and Dillon were together for a while but…" Ady snorted.

"Please, I miss the cockroaches and carpet beetles more then him."

"Well, I certainly think you can do better. Let me know if you change your mind." Ady nodded vaguely.

"You want to get lunch or something after my shift?"

"It's Thursday…" Ady replied.

"Oh…right…the babysitting thing. You going to be there all night again? You got home at like, noon yesterday…"

"Oh yeah well Gr…uh, the guy got home around four and made breakfast," she said, adding the last in a sort of mumble while taking another drink of coffee. "Then the girls woke up and I sort of…got roped into coloring for a while…"

"You guys had breakfast at four o' clock…?"

"Mhmm…blueberry pancakes," she said while smiling faintly. They drank their coffee in silence for a while. Finally Vanessa looked up and cast Ady a brief inquiring look.

"Is there something going on between you and this guy?" She asked. Ady colored a little.

"Er…why?"

"Well, I dunno, is it normal to eat breakfast with the dad of the kids your babysitting at four o' clock…by yourself? Plus, there was that dinner thing a few weeks ago and you spend a lot of time over there. I mean, I didn't ask before because, well…I dunno a single dad didn't seem very…you."

"Look, we're not…" she started with some embarrassment and perhaps a hint of frustration. "It's not really…entirely like that, and even if it was, what's wrong with me…hanging out with a single dad?" Single dad wasn't really the characteristic _she_ was concerned with. Hell, she hadn't even gotten down to being concerned with his age. There were SO many things that were worrying about him to be considering normal issues.

"Well, nothing…it's just kind of weird going from the guy who got a vasectomy at eighteen to a guy with three kids."

"Look, it's…kind of hard to explain, okay."

"Oh…okay…" Vanessa said after eyeing the older woman for a moment, who's blush had deepened slightly. "I mean…I know you're older then me, you probably know what you're doing,"

Ady stared at her coffee wearily. Yeah, she knew what she was doing. That's why she was spending time with a guy who, instead of flowers gave her a pair of shoes that shot rockets. She was brought out of her gloomy thoughts when Vanessa started talking again.

"Hmm?" Ady said, "Sorry, I was thinking."

"I was just saying that a guy like that is probably looking for…commitment and stuff…and you just never struck me as someone who did that."

"Yeah he's a real romantic," Ady said cynically as she stood and drained her coffee. "Trust me, it's not what you think." She set the cup on the counter.

"Okay, well…I suppose if you want to invite him…"

"I finally called about getting a rental car yesterday," she interupted, with the intention of changing the subject quickly, "I need to pick it up before I head over there."

"Oh, okay. Hey, you wouldn't mind stopping for a few things on your way back would you?" Vanessa asked as Ady headed up the stairs to get dressed.

"Yeah all right," she called back down.

"Kay, thanks, I'll leave a list on the counter."

XXX

Margo reminded Gru of the letter from the school board earlier that morning. She knew that if she didn't he would probably forget. Gru eyed it for the second time while he was making coffee. Margo was sitting at the counter.

"Why can I not do dis weeth a phone call?" He asked.

"Well…you need to be able to prove that you're our guardian. You can't do that over the phone."

"Why? Dey often 'ave strangers enrolling odder peoples cheeldren een school?" Margo shrugged.

"It's just the rule, dad. You can probably just take the adoption papers." Gru sighed.

"You cannot just skeep de school dis year?"

"Yeah," Edith said from beside Margo, hope rising into her blue eyes.

"No, we can't skip it," Margo said with some exasperation while she crossed her arms and cast a look at her younger sister. "It's important."

"What are you, eleven? And she ees seven…what theengs are you learneeng at seven dat one year ees dat important." Gru turned and caught her expression.

"Well, some people would say learning to read is important. Besides…it might be nice to be able to hang out with other kids." Gru made a vague sound of disgust in the back of his throat.

"Odder cheeldren…can't you…catch theengs off of dem?" he said while squirming slightly.

"Well…sometimes...I guess,"

"You are not bringeeng dem back here," he said. The last thing he needed were children in his house…well…present company excluded obviously.

"Fine," Margo said, with aggravation, "but that doesn't change the fact that we need to go to school, dad."

"All right, all right." He said as he tucked the letter in his pocket, conceding in the face of her severity. "I will go today while you are at de ballet, since Ady does not want me driving anyways."

"I'm sure it wont take long," she said while Edith leaned on the counter morosely.

XXX

An hour or so later, after picking up her rental, which wasn't all that impressive but still had the benefit of not being a cab, Ady pulled up in front of Gru's house and headed up to the front door. She issued a short knock and stood back on the steps

"Who is it?" Ady heard Agnes' muffled voice on the other side.

"It's Ady."

"Hiee Ady," the little girl exclaimed happily.

"Hiee Agnes," Ady returned with less enthusiasm. "Can you get someone to open the door please?"

"Hold on," She heard a sound that may have been tiny hands trying to scrabble at the knob.

"Agnes…"

"I can do it…" Ady tucked her hands in her pockets; she looked around listlessly while listening to the pathetic fumbling on the other side of the woodwork.

Next door, Fred was kneeling in his flower garden, wearing a stupid straw hat and some gloves. He caught Ady's eye and gave her a wave. Ady smiled jadedly in return, before she turned back towards Gru's house.

"How's that door coming, Agnes?"

"I'm stuck."

"How are you stuck?"

"I jumped to reach the knob and now I can't get down," Ady sighed and carefully pushed at the door. It swung open softly and she slipped in and gently pulled Agnes off of the knob where she was dangling.

"Well done," Ady said as she set the younger girl down. When she straightened Margo and Edith were coming down the stairs. Agnes clutched at her leg immediately.

"Hey Ady," Margo said. "Agnes, hurry up and get your shoes on, we need to leave soon." Agnes nodded, detached from Ady's leg and bounced towards the stairs.

"Where's Gru?" Ady asked.

"I think he went to clear up the backyard a little bit." Margo replied.

"Ah, okay…good," Ady said, mildly surprised that Gru was actually getting rid of the poison ivy. "I finally rented a car," Ady added before nudging the door open again. "Why don't you guys go put your stuff in the back and I'll go let him know I'm here."

As Ady headed towards the backyard she experienced one moment of amusement when she compared Gru to his neighbor. Gru was also kneeling down and wearing gloves, which were thick and black, but rather then delicately cutting leaves, he was yanking at pieces of poison ivy and poison oak.

"Hey Gru," Ady said. He looked up and straightened in one single nervous action, almost as if he'd been caught doing something wrong.

"Hello," he said as he pulled off the gloves and tossed them on a clear patch of lawn…although lawn wasn't so much the right word…it was more like dirt.

"Are you planning to pull out all of this by hand?" Ady asked while eyeing the yard. "Because if you are it's probably going to take you a while."

"I was just geeting de stuff close to de house…I will get de rest weeth a flamethrower or sometheeng," he replied.

"Really? This lawn looks like it's dry enough to catch fire without help…"

"I will work out de details lator," he said, while nodding towards the house, indicating that she should precede him. "How are your feet?"

"Itchy…a little better I guess,"

"Dere ees still de cream eef you need some," he said as she followed him back to the front yard.

"Thanks." He cast her a brief, timid look.

"Deed you need any money for a cab?"

"I thought you said last week that you weren't going to pay for a cab."

"Ah, well…yes…obviously I…uh…" Ady raised her eyebrow a little.

"It's okay, I have a car," she said while nodding towards the street. "So I don't need cab fair and _you_ won't have to drive us to the dance studio…with any luck for a long long long time."

"I 'ave de errands to run today anyways," Gru said reproachfully.

"Heading down to the acme incorporation to get more tnt?"

"No," Gru said with a sigh. "I 'ave to go down to de local school and enroll de gurls so dat dey can be around _odder keeds," _he said the last with an edge in his voice. "Dat way dey can breeng home germs and lorn about important theengs like what 2x2 ees."

"_You're_ going to a school?"

"Yes, apparently I 'ave no choice."

"You're going like that?" She asked. Margo, Edith and Agnes had gravitated over after loading their bags into the car.

"Yeah, so?"

He eyed Ady wearily as she approached him and then raised his eyebrows and colored slightly as she touched his stomach and sides.

"What are you doeeng?" Gru asked nervously.

"You have weapons with you don't you?"

"Yes…"

"Gru, no school is going to let you get past the front doors looking like you…being armed probably wont help." He shrugged.

"Dey can try to stop me eef dey weesh." Ady exchanged a look with Margo.

"Well…no…they probably can't…but they can keep you from sending your daughters there."

"I do not see how…"

"Dad…" Margo started. Ady waved at her.

"Here, let me try. I'll talk slowly. Gru, when people send their kids to school they can get a little funny about them being, like, safe and stuff. Arriving there in a tank, armed to the teeth would be considered by most people as the wrong way to go about things. I mean…even just going there dressed in a black coat and scarf is probably going to raise suspicion."

Gru raised his eyebrow; Margo was giving him a worried look. He gave in on the basis that even though he didn't particularly want to make the trip down to the school, he also didn't want to let his daughter down.

"All right, fine, what ees eet, dat you are reccomendeeng?"

"Uhh, well you can start by leaving all of your weapons behind..." Ady cast another look at Margo, who returned the look imploringly. Ady took Gru's arm and pulled him towards the house. "Come on, we'll figure something out, there's got to be a way to make you look less…well…like you."

XXX

Gru was sitting at the edge of his bed with his shoulders hunched while Margo and Ady went through his closet. Ady raised her eyebrow and pulled out a white smock.

"What's with the dentist shirt?" She asked as she pulled a red comb out of the pocket and examined it.

"Daddy's a dentist as a hobby," Agnes said happily. She had crawled up beside him on his bed and beamed at him.

"What?" Ady said while giving Gru a weird look.

"Eet ees not a hobby…dat ees just a costume…" Gru said, while looking sideways at Agnes.

"But you said…"

"I lied." Agnes puffed a little in frustration.

"Okay…" Ady said before putting the smock aside and digging into his closet again. "Here, this is all right." She said as she pulled out a button up dress shirt and tossed it to him.

"You should wear a tie," Margo said. "So it looks like your getting off of work or something."

"Eef I was geeting off ove work, I would not be weareeng a tie…and I certainly wouldn't be keepeeng my weapons behind," he said as he started undoing the buttons on the dress shirt so he could take it off the hanger.

"She means if you had a real job, Gru." Ady said. He glared at her for a moment.

"'Ave you been talkeeng to my mother?"

"Hmm?"

"Notheeng, never mind. Geet out so I can geet dressed."

"Here," Margo said as she handed her father a tie she found at the back of his closet before they went out into the hall.

Gru shut the door behind them with a sigh and unzipped his coat.

A few minutes later he surfaced from his room wearing the shirt and pulling the tie, which was red, over his shoulders.

"What happened to the tie we got you on father's day?" Agnes asked accusingly.

"What tie?" he said as he began messing with the article with inexperience as he tried to remember how to make the knot.

"The one with the cute bear on it." Gru looked up, his eyes glazing over slightly.

"Oh…right…I forgot…I must 'ave left eet een de lab or sometheeng," he said carefully. He'd forgotten that that had been a gift from them…actually it might have been intention repression.

Ady took the tie from Gru's unresisting fingers when it became clear that he wasn't getting anywhere.

"Did you get rid of all of your weapons?" She asked as she finished the knot and straightened out his collar. He was watching her awkwardly.

"Er," Gru considered this for a moment. "Thee ones een my coat," He got down on his knee like he was going to tie a shoe and pulled on his right pant leg revealing dark socks, which were being held up by straps. These had tiny loops in them, each of which appeared to hold a tiny stick of dynamite. He caught Ady's expression after plucking a few.

"What?"

"Nothing," Ady said, while eyeing the small explosions that he had cast aside. "I just wasn't aware that people still wore sock garters." He scowled at her before moving to the other leg.

"If we don't leave soon we're going to be late," Margo said, looking at the older woman. Ady nodded and after eyeing Gru for a moment approached him with the intention of tucking in the loose ends of his shirt. This got a more violent reaction then she would have expected when he jerked away from her and went from being on one knee to sitting on the floor.

"Agh, what are you doeeng!" Gru said.

"I was just tucking in your shirt," Ady said, wide eyed.

"I will do eet," he mumbled with awkwardness as he straightened and clumsily began to tuck in his shirt.

"Wow, your face got really red," Edith said while looking at him owlishly. He shot her a look.

After he'd finished with the shirt and removed the dynamite, he followed Ady and the girls back down the stairs and out the front door, playing with the tie, which was quite a bit more uncomfortable then his scarf was.

"You don't happen to have another car, do you?" Ady asked while nodding at his tank. "That thing is even more conspicuous then the coat."

"No," he said. "De only other theeng I 'ave is de ship and I 'ave a feeling eet would draw more attention."

"Maybe we could drop him off." Margo said with a shrug.

"No thanks, I would prefer to not be at dat school for longer den necessary." Gru said bitterly. Margo eyed Ady.

"I don't suppose you could like…switch cars…"

"_No_," Ady said firmly.

"Come on, it'd only be for one afternoon."

"Nuh uh, not with the way he drives," she continued while crossing her arms. "He already ruined one car and this one isn't even mine, and you can just stop looking at me like that, it isn't going to change anything."

"I said I was sorry for de car," Gru mumbled.

Ady looked sideways at the girls who were eyeing her with their big, devious eyes and deflated.

"Fine," she said with frustration as she pulled out the keys and shoved them at Gru. "but I swear to god, if you so much as get a parking ticket, I am going to punch you in the nose,"

"I will be careful," Gru said while pulling another set of keys out of his pocket. "Here."

"What's this?"

"De keys for de tank."

"I don't know how to drive a tank." Gru shrugged.

"Eet ees a tank, eet doesn't matter eef you drive eet badly,"

A few minutes later Ady watched the rental pull away.

"He's driving a used Honda and wearing a button up shirt with a tie…and he still looks like he's going to shoot someone," she said after a moment

"I'm sure he'll do fine…" the younger girl added with a hint of doubt.

"Yeah…come on, we'd better get going so I can figure out this thing," she said while eyeing the keys.

XXX

On his way to the school Gru was trying to remember how to drive a car. He'd done it before; it had just been a long time since he'd had to think about driving laws.

He was feeling very uncomfortable. Apart from being scrunched up against the driver side door he was also feeling somewhat naked without his weapons. He couldn't remember the last time he'd gone somewhere without anything on him.

By the time he pulled up to the school he was in a foul mood. He parked crookedly in the handicap spot and closed the door behind him, looking up at the public school with a hint of discomfort. He sighed and headed towards the building, folding his hands behind his back.

Gru walked through the front doors and caught the eye of a security guard standing nearby. The man gave him a suspicious look, but didn't stop him.

The office was near the front door. There was a woman behind the desk and a small line of two or three people in front of her. Currently at the front of the line was a young woman who was filling something out.

A child was sitting in a chair nearby, kicking at the wall. It was unclear as to whom he belonged to as everyone was ignoring him. Gru automatically reached for his freeze ray and then cursed under his breath, turning the action into an attempt to straighten the tie. Then he stood by the door into the office and eyed the line bitterly.

"You have a big nose," The child said, ceasing his kicking. He caught the child's gaze and glared. "It looks weird."

Gru sighed and looked away, folding his hands behind his back again.

"It makes you look like a penguin…cause you're kind of fat too."

Gru stomped his left foot. There was a click and a small knife blade shot out of the tip of his shoe. This was an item he was unable to remove because he'd installed it in all of his dress shoes. The child eyed it with wide eyes and then jumped up from his chair and went to his mother, who turned out to be the woman at the front of the line.

"Mom, that man has a knife," the little boy said, while tugging on his mother's sleeve.

"I told you to keep quiet while I do this. Go sit down," his mother hissed back,

"But mom…"

"Sit down Richard!"

Gru had surreptitiously nudged the blade back into his shoe when the boy sat back down. He shot Gru a couple of fearful looks.

A second office attendant approached the desk, making the lines move fairly quickly. This was fortunate because the young woman was still filling out the form by the time Gru reached the desk.

"Can I help you, sir?"

"I am here to enroll my daughters een de school," he said impatiently.

"Okay, I just need you to fill this out," the man said while pulling out a sheet of paper and setting it in front of Gru. He stared at the form and felt a flicker of discomfort as he read it. Among other things he had to put down what his work address and work number was. He started writing, deciding that his work number was going to be Dr. Nefarios cell phone number.

"Are you a secret agent?" Gru looked sideways at the boy sitting on the chair. He was staring at Gru, apparently over his initial fear. Gru ignored him, turning back to the form and turning his back slightly to the child. "I saw a show once with a secret agent and he had a knife in his shoe too," he heard from the chair. There was a moment of silence.

"Do you have a watch with a laser in it?"

"I am not a secret agent!" Gru hissed back. He caught the eye of the guy at the desk, who was giving him a strange look, before returning to the form.

"Are you a spy? There was another guy in the show that talked funny like you and he was a spy," the boy said. He'd scooted over to a chair closer to where Gru was standing.

"No, I am not a spy." He said with some annoyance as he finished the form and pushed it back towards the man.

"All right, uh…Dr. Gru. I just need see some proof of guardianship…" Gru pulled the adoption papers out of his pocket and set them on the desk. The man unfolded them and examined them with perhaps more care then he might otherwise take.

"If you're not a secret agent and you're not a spy, why do you have a knife in your shoe?" Gru ignored him.

"Okay these seem to be in order. I just need to see some ID," Gru frowned and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. Another smaller object fell on the ground without him noticing as he opened it and showed his drivers license to the man at the desk.

"Hey you dropped this," the boy said as he picked up the aforementioned item, which looked like a key chain. Gru looked sideways as the boy held it up. The child hissed and dropped it. "Ow, it's hot."

After spending so much time ensuring he'd not had his weapons he hadn't thought to empty his pockets. Gru looked down at the floor, where the key chain was letting off a tendril of smoke. He exclaimed something indefinable and kicked it out into the hall, where it blew up.

XXX

Ady eyed the mechanics of the tank awkwardly.

"Maybe we should just call a cab," she said nervously.

"If we have to wait for a cab we'll be late," Margo said with a shrug.

"Come on, just start it," Edith added. Ady sighed, inserted the key and turned it. The tank revved to life.

"Okay, gears…" Ady mumbled as she pulled at something that she hoped was right. Instead of a regular steering wheel there was a smaller half wheel. Well, what's the worse that could happen? Ady frowned, but stepped on what she believed to be the gas anyways. She accidentally knocked Fred's trashcans over but other then that she managed to get to the street okay.

XXX

When Perkins entered the living room he fixed his son with the slightly weary look he generally wore while looking at his son before turning towards Hugo who had finally looked away from the fish, despite their almost horribly mesmerizing behavior.

"So, now that you've had time to observe Gru, I think it's time to move to the next step." Perkins said while he sat down on his son's couch and steepled his fingers on his son's coffee table.

"I think we should start by discussing…what have I just put my elbow in?" Perkins straightened and eyed his sleeve.

"Oh," Vector said, "Sorry, dipping cheese. I'll just…move that." Perkins glared at his son. He pulled a handkerchief out of the top pocket of his jacket and began wiping at his elbow before he continued.

"As I was saying, we should start discussing possible ways to…make it so that Gru is less…problematic."

"Well I've been concocting a brilliant place myself…" Vector started.

"Actually…Viktor, I was thinking, you could contribute, for the time being by observing, rather then…well…doing things. This is, after all a test for Mr. Hugo."

"Uh, just Hugo," Hugo said after casting Vector a look that, to the man's eye, seemed to contain a bit of smugness. "Actually, I think I should probably have a bit more information before I start coming up with something concrete."

"Like what?" Perkins said. Patience was not a thing that came easily to him.

"Habits, defenses, recent projects…stuff like that."

Vector crossed his arms, then, after a moment he pulled his sleeve up. There was an object like a watch on his arm, although the screen size was as large as a cell phone. It showed a grid of the city. A light on the screen was moving. It was shaped vaguely like a star.

"I'm just, going to get a soda," he said before he stood and slinked off with all of the subtlety of…well a starfish on a tank. Fortunately for him, neither man seemed all that interested. This…wannabe could come up with whatever ill planned scheme he wanted. Vector was going to do things his own way.

XXX

Okay, so I intended for this to be longer, but it's taken a while again. Also, I want to take my time on what happens next in the story and didn't want to feel rushed. Hope this turned out all right.

Liloapril: hehe, I'm very glad you like the chapter; sorry this one took so long. Yeah, still taking my time but eventually there will be more of the fluff, and certainly more then in the last chapter…although probably not to an unrealistic degree. Thanks for the review :)

Have a good afternoon everyone. :) Thank you for your comments and faves and such.


	6. In The Lobster Tank

Chapter Six:

In The Lobster Tank

Driving the tank was an interesting experience. It actually wasn't as difficult as she expected. The controls were pretty close to that of a car. There was a steering wheel similar to the kind one might find in the cockpit of a plane. It was more of a closed in area then she was used to, but built so that it could at least accommodate Gru, so Ady had no trouble with that considering the size of his shoulders.

The main problem was how much attention it drew. Every time she stopped at a red light or intersection she got odd looks from nearby cars. Although on the plus side no one tried to tailgate her, particularly considering the rocket booster on the back. Unfortunately she forgot this when she was parking at the dance studio and accidentally set some bushes on fire.

"Oh…dammit" Ady said as she beat out the flames with her sweatshirt, "well they were kind of ugly anyways." She tried to ignore the attention she was getting from mothers entering the building. As she returned to the tank and threw her now slightly scorched sweatshirt in the back, she eyed the back of the vehicle briefly.

"What's with the starfish?" She said before scraping it off with her foot. Agnes picked it up.

"I like it, I'm going to call him Henry,"

"I'd just leave that alone Agnes, looks pretty dirty," Ady said.

"Where'd it come from?" Margo asked.

"I probably got stuck there while your dad was busy terrorizing the beach or something. Come on, we're going to be late."

Agnes slipped the starfish in one of the bags Ady was carrying without her noticing before following the woman and her older sisters towards the studio.

XXX

After the dance lesson Ady remembered that she was supposed to stop at the store. There was a small market nearby, within walking distance and she suggested going after the girl's dance practice was over so that she could get it done with.

She realized after a few minutes what a mistake this was. She had no experience whatsoever in shopping with children, although she had noticed on other outings to the supermarket that whenever parents with small children were around it was best to go somewhere else. Generally this was emphasized by a small child screaming and crying while their mother or father either tried to ignore them or shouted at them as they attempted to drag them around while the child acted as if their legs had given out or something. It didn't occur to Ady that this was just a child's natural reaction at being at the grocery store.

Every few seconds Agnes was asking questions about what everything was and bouncing around excitedly. On two or three occasions Ady tried to grab her to calm her down and eventually found that if she allowed Agnes to grab a hold of her hand or pant leg the girl was less likely to run in excited circles and instead just looked around happily and chattered continuously about whatever popped into her head.

Edith, as usual was worse. She kept climbing on the shelves, and pulling her hat over her eyes and walking around, blindly bumping into other shoppers and displays.

Because her shopping list wasn't too long Ady had grabbed a basket instead of a cart and Margo had offered to carry this. Ady was still carrying the girls' bags from ballet practice, mainly because she hadn't thought to throw them in Gru's tank.

"Hey!" Ady said as Edith sent a display containing boxes of graham crackers onto the floor. Ady pulled her back by her arm and pulled her hat up a little. "Stop that," she added as she let go of Agnes' hand so that she could pick the boxes up.

"Come on Edith," Margo added as she extended her hand so that the younger girl would take it. Edith stuck her tongue out and crossed her arms so her hands weren't exposed.

After she got the last box back up on the display Ady searched through the girls' bags where she'd absently tossed her shopping list and pulled the starfish out of it for a moment, frowning and examining it briefly before setting it down absently on a nearby surface. She pulled the list out and eyed it until she felt a tug on her leg and looked down at Agnes who was holding a zucchini.

"Do you need this thing?"

"Uh…no…no Agnes, go put it back," she said as she returned her gaze to her list as the small girl bounced back towards the display to return the vegetable. Ady looked up again wearily at the sound of what, she suspected was a dozen zucchini hitting the floor, followed by a quiet, 'oops.'

XXX

Vector decided that because Gru would probably recognize his ship that he would try out a new vehicle he'd designed. It was called The Route Amphibious Mudskipper Perambulator. It was a vehicle that was supposed to be able to travel on land and sea. It was orange and white and shaped like a fish.

He followed the signal to the dance studio, where he spotted Gru's car, although by then the starfish had already been long removed and the dot he had been following was now apparently inside the supermarket. He frowned. Okay, so maybe a starfish was a little conspicuous. He hoped that Gru hadn't identified it as a tracking device straight off.

Vector picked up the piranha gun, laying on the passenger seat and tucked it away before leaving the vehicle and heading in the direction of the signal. He did so in a manner that he thought was sneaky, dodging behind cars, while keeping an eye on the dot as he entered the supermarket and crouched behind a display of apples. Needless to say he got a lot of weird looks both in the parking lot and the store.

He continued to move like this, behind displays, while keeping an eye out, until finally someone glared at him after he took refuge behind their cart. In any case, he followed his tracking device to a display of peaches where the starfish was sitting forlornly. Vector frowned and then dismally headed towards the junk food aisle.

By this point Ady had somehow managed to progress through produce and into the aisle with cereal where Edith was lying on the floor playing dead. Ady nudged her with her toe a little.

"Hey, come on, get up," she said while trying to ignore the looks she was getting from people passing by. "Agnes, no I don't need fruit bars, put them back on the shelf," she added as the girl extended the box to her. After the zucchini she'd had to ensure Agnes that she didn't need croutons, pretzels, dry milk and pepperonis. Apparently the younger girl was trying to help by grabbing everything within arms reach in case it was something on Ady's list.

"I can't get up, I'm dead," Edith said, her voice half muffled by the floor.

"No you're not, dead people don't talk," she said with some frustration. Margo had tried to drag her to her feet but only managed to fall herself. Edith didn't respond.

"If you don't get up, I'm going to take your hat," Edith pulled her hat down firmly over her face.

"Nuh uh." Ady crossed her arms.

"Come on, kid, you'll have plenty of time to play dead at home. You can do it when your dad gets home to annoy him." Edith was silent for a few minutes before she turned her head towards Ady, who was kneeling beside her.

"Can we get stuff for fake blood?"

"I thought your dad banned that stuff."

"So?" Ady sighed in the face of this childlike logic.

"We'll see, either way in about two seconds I'm going to continue shopping, if you want to lie on the floor then maybe I'll be back later to drag you away."

"Are you going to stay and play with us?"

"I guess," Ady said with a shrug.

Edith rolled on her back and offered a hand, half consumed by her sleeve and Ady pulled her up to her feet.

"All right, well, hopefully this won't take too much longer," Ady said in a mumble as she pulled her list out again.

"Uh, maybe we could help," Margo said while taking Agnes hand to keep her from grabbing at a thing of oatmeal, probably to see if Ady needed it. Ady eyed her doubtfully for a moment, or rather she eyed Edith doubtfully for a moment before shrugging.

"Okay, but you need to come straight back okay…no wondering around…I mean it." Margo nodded.

"I need a loaf of bread. Why don't you guys go get that and then we'll meet over there by that milk," she said while nodding towards the dairy section. "Please don't knock anything over, or climb on anything or blow anything up…please."

Margo pulled at Edith's shirt and they headed towards the aisle with the bread.

XXX

In a weird way Margo was enjoying being at the grocery store. Even now that she was trying to keep Edith from getting in people's way while she jumped from floor tile to floor, trying to avoid the white ones.

Margo had never been shopping with her mother when she was alive. She'd dreamed about it though, at the orphanage. Not just going to a grocery store, of course, although it was amazing how ordinary some of her daydreams had been back then. She dreamed about having a mother to go shopping with and a father who'd have a knee to sit on or shoulders to ride on. She dreamed about family vacations, holidays, being at the park, having someone to go home from school to and…well it went on and on.

The other night Agnes had turned over in her bed while Margo was dozing off and had asked if she thought Gru was going to marry Ady. Margo had very carefully said that she didn't know and then advised Agnes to not pose this question either to Ady or their father.

Agnes had then mentioned that it seemed as if both Ady and Gru were confused about what grownups were supposed to do when they liked each other and Margo had told her to go to sleep. Unlike her younger sister, she knew that adult relationships were probably a lot more complicated then they seemed, although a part of her had thought at the time that maybe there was some truth to Agnes' statement. Their dad certainly seemed to be fairly hopeless around Ady…maybe they really didn't know what to do with one another.

As for Ady well…she was most certainly not their mother, nor was she anything like what Margo had day dreamed about at night, in the orphanage after her sisters had fallen asleep, but when it really came down to it, neither was Gru…he was about as far away from her idea of a father had been.

The important thing was not to get her or her sister's hopes up…er, not too much anyways.

"There's the bread you guys," she said as she pulled Edith off of one of the brown tiles, resulting in the younger girl moaning about being burned to death by lava.

XXX

Vector was standing in the aisle with the cookies and crackers. Currently he had three boxes of cookies under one arm and another one which he had opened slightly to munch on, while he eyed the starfish, trying to figure out how to get the tracking device off of it so that he could put it in something less obvious.

It occurred to Vector that it probably hadn't been wise to have the starfish swallow the device. After a few minutes he sighed and stuffed it in his fanny pack, he was just about to head out, after grabbing a few more boxes of cookies when he heard the faint voices of children, familiar voices. Vector sidled over to the opening of the next aisle, where Margo, Edith and Agnes were standing and examining the bread.

He chuckled a bit to himself and after brushing some crumbs off of his jacket walked into the aisle in what he probably thought was a cool and calculating manner.

"Well, well, if it isn't the three little orphaned twerps who spoiled my plans," he said. Margo turned towards him and automatically pulled her sisters back.

"Vector…" she said, while giving him a distrustful look. He gave her a haughty smile.

"I thought you lived on the moon now," Agnes said from beside her, causing his smile to fade a little.

"No, I do not live on the moon," he said with some annoyance. "Thanks to Gru and you three brats I was stranded up there."

"If you hadn't kidnapped us, it wouldn't have happened," Margo said as she let go of Edith's sleeve, in order to fiddle with her glasses. The younger girl took the opportunity to make a face at him.

"Yeah…well, if you hadn't distracted me with your cookies, Gru wouldn't have gotten my shrink ray and I wouldn't have had to kidnap you, either way you're going to pay for it now," he said as he unzipped his fanny pack.

Margo crossed her arms and with a smug look on her face said;

"I want a lemon meringue."

Before Vector could question this he was floored by the sudden sensation that his teeth were trying to escape his mouth and the earwax was running out of his ears. Vector had actually made his suit somewhat resilient to electric shock after he had accidentally glided into a telephone wire, but it was still not the most pleasant of feelings.

He recovered quickly, after watching a spark trail his glasses and grabbed at Margo, pulling her off of her feet as she struggled in his grasp. Her glasses fell off and clattered to the floor, sliding beneath a display of rolls.

"All right, happy meal, let's see how tough you are in the lobster tank," he hissed as he half carried, half dragged Margo over to a large lobster tank at the edge of the sea food section. "Quiet down!" He added when Agnes began to shout. He looked over his shoulder to assure himself that Gru was nowhere around. Even if he had been Vector could have just used Margo as a shield anyways.

"Hey, let her go," Edith said before kicking him in the shins. Vector shouted, almost lost his grip on Margo, managed to keep hold and shoved Edith back. At this point he was hit very hard on the back of the head by a bottle of bleach that Ady had been carrying when she reached them.

XXX

This time Vector did let Margo go, mainly because, while the bleach was just in a plastic bottle, it had still been a pretty good swing. Margo scrambled to her feet and pulled her sisters over to Ady who was eyeing the villain angrily.

"Hey man, what the hell do you think you're doing?" She said as Agnes attached to her leg. Vector straightened, rubbing at the back of his head and eyeing the young woman with annoyance and incomprehension.

"What? _Who are you?"_

"She's our babysitter," Edith said before sticking her tongue out at Vector.

"Babysitter," he scoffed. "Ooh, I'm so scared," Vector said as he straightened his glasses. Ady raised her eyebrow and looked sideways at Margo.

"Who is this idiot?" She said with some annoyance.

"Idiot? You don't know who you're dealing with girly," Vector said as he unzipped his jacket. "Names Vector,"

"Vector…like…something that transmits disease…"

"No! It's a mathematical term used to describe a quantity specified by both direction and magnitude because I'm committing crimes with direction AND magnitude. Impressed? You should be," he said as he reached into his jacket and pulled out a gun that appeared to be full of fish.

"Er…" she started. Her anger had turned very quickly to embarrassed confusion.

"This is one of my own creations, back off or face the consequences, babysitter!" Ady stared at the gun for a moment, eventually her complete bewilderment melted into weariness. She crossed her arms. It would be nice if occasionally, strange things did not happen while around Gru or his kids.

"Friend of your dad's?" Ady said bitterly.

"He kidnapped us once so dad would give him the moon,"

Vector, clearly feeling as if she wasn't taking the situation seriously enough, scowled.

"Wow, and he's still alive. What's with the water gun?" She added.

"Water gun pff, clearly you don't know an innovative piece of weaponry when you've seen one. Let me to give you a demonstration," he said evilly before pointing the gun toward Ady and pulling the trigger, before she could react there was a flopping sound as something hit the loose button up shirt she was wearing, leaving a wet mark before it fell to the supermarket floor and laid still. Agnes had moved a little closer to her and was eyeing it suspiciously.

"That looks like a fish," Ady said after a moment of inspection.

"It's not just a fish, it's a piranha, a genetically modified piranha…a vicious killer."

"Well…whatever it is, I think it may be dead."

"It's not dead," Vector said with some annoyance. "It's just…oh…" he held his gun up a little to examine a crack in barrel, which was leaking. "Ooh…"

"Are you going to kick his butt?" Edith asked, her eyes flashing maliciously for a moment while Vector prodded at the damaged gun.

"I have a feeling this one's already had plenty of beatings. Margo, go get your glasses and let's get the hell out of here," she said the last in a bit of a mumble as Margo nodded at her and fished under the display for her fallen glasses.

"Hey!" Vector said, looking up as he tossed aside the piranha gun and pulled out the jellyfish ray. "I'm not finished with you yet!" Ady turned back wearily, in time to see Vector grab a hold of Edith's arm and aim the gun at her head. The older woman's eyes flashed. "You can tell Gru…" that was as far as he got.

Vector was pretty good with technology and generally could defend himself competently as long as he surrounded himself with it. What he did not have any experience or skill in whatsoever was any kind of close combat. This included being punched in the face by an angry woman, who already had severely reduced patience for anyone who called themself a villain and pointed a gun at her.

Vector's warm up suit was really, just for show. He wore it because he thought it looked cool and it stretched nicely and therefore made for comfortable couch wear. He was not athletically gifted and this made it easier for Ady to twist his arm behind his back and shove him against a shelf. The gun was pried from his grasp and then thrown in the lobster tank, which Vector had previously threatened to throw Margo into, where it settled towards the bottom and went off, thereby releasing a confused jellyfish among some equally confused lobsters.

XXX

Gru parked Ady's rental at the curb of his house. While he was walking around the car he caught sight of a slip of paper under the windshield wiper. He scowled and removed it before eyeing it wearily. It was a ticket for handicap parking. Gru frowned and tucked it in his pocket as he headed towards the house.

When Ady and the girls got home, Gru was in the living room. He was in the process of loosening the red tie and gave them a somewhat guilty look as they shut the front door behind them.

"How'd it go, dad?" Margo said brightly as she set their bags down near the couch.

"Er…less den satisfactory…" Gru said carefully. His daughter frowned a little.

"Did you fill out the papers?" She asked as Agnes ran in and attached to her father's leg.

"Yes,"

"So…are we enrolled in school?"

"Not exactly…" Gru said as he picked up the younger girl. Edith had crawled up on the couch.

"Why not?" Margo said unhappily.

"I may 'ave accidentally…blown up part ove de buildeeng," Gru said, while grimacing slightly.

"You blew up the school…"Ady said horrified, after casting a brief look at Margo.

"Cool," Edith said approvingly.

"Not de whole school…just a small portion ove eet."

"How? We took everything away from you!" Ady said.

"Dere was a small explosive keychain een my pocket dat I…overlooked," he replied while turning his uncertain gaze from Ady to his daughter.

"Dad…" Margo said sadly, as she headed towards the stairs.

"I will try again…Margo," he called after her, his shoulders slumping.

"Does this mean we don't have to go to school?" Edith said hopefully.

"No eet does not. Eet just means dat I will 'ave to try again…not at dat school…I theenk dey will not be haveeng classes for a while…"

XXX

After being pestered by Edith, Ady helped her make some fake blood, much to Gru's dismay. In the meantime Margo and Agnes sat at the counter and colored. After they were finished with the blood it was then stored in the fridge to congeal properly and they cleaned the counters so that Gru could start on dinner, during which Ady was dragged out front by Agnes to watch while Margo helped the younger girl make a wreath of dandelions.

Gru came out at around 7:30. He shed the apron on the coat wrack by the front door. Underneath he was still wearing the clothing he'd worn to go to the school but had untucked his shirt and removed the tie.

"Deener ees ready, gurls," he said.

As they headed towards the house, Agnes stopped at the steps and tugged on Ady's sleeve.

"I made this for you," she said while extending the mass of dandelions.

"Oh, thanks Agnes," Ady said as she took it, holding it out as if she weren't sure what to do with it.

"You're sposed to put it on your head…like a crown."

After a moment of hesitation Ady carefully set the wreath of weeds on top of her red hair and raised her eyebrow. Agnes smiled at her and then hopped up the stairs into the house.

Gru put his hands in his pockets and sat down next to her with a sigh.

"Would you like to stay for deener?"

"Nah, I should get going," Ady replied while she pulled at a dandelion that had untangled from the headpiece and was dangling in front of her eye.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot. I ran into a friend of yours today,' she added cynically.

"What?"

"Some dork with a bad haircut who was dressed in orange. Called himself Vector."

"_Where_?" Gru asked, suddenly alert.

"At the supermarket…he threatened us with a fish gun. Tell me, are all villains just people who got way too many wedgies in highschool?"

"No," Gru said with some annoyance. "Deed he cause any trouble?"

"Not really…I gave him a black eye and we left while he was busy trying to fish his weapon out of the lobster tank." Gru raised his eyebrows.

"Well…dat guy ees dangerous. Be careful."

"Dangerous huh…" Ady said skeptically. "You have a lot of room to talk. I mean…seriously Gru…an explosive keychain?" He looked sideways at her.

"Eet was one ove Dr. Nefario's inventions…I took eet away from him on de trip to de A.C.E, I forgot eet was dere," he added the last in more defensive tones when her expression didn't change. "Eet must've gone through de wash…eet was fortunate eet deed not go off prior to dis…dey were always very touchy…Eet was an accident…"

"Yeah…I imagine it could have happened to anyone," Ady said with a sigh.

"Well fine den…eef I am as dangerous as dat den assume dat I know what I am talkeeng about."

"Soo…are you saying he's more dangerous then you…because…I'm gonna be honest if I'm not going to be intimidated by you, I'm certainly not going to be freaked out by a guy who arms himself with the contents of an exotic pet store."

"Eet ees deeferent…eet ees unlikely dat you will 'ave de same experience weeth de other villains dat you had weeth me,"

"Yeah, let's hope not…that's the last thing I need."

"I deed try…at de school," he added after a few moments.

Ady met his gaze and relented a little.

"Well…next time you'll just have to…empty your pockets…I guess. My cars in one piece…so there's that," she added. They were quiet for a while as she eyed the moon, which was sitting above the horizon.

"The moon looks bigger lately," Ady said, perhaps in slightly accusatory tones, while she rested her chin in her hand.

"Eet might be slightly closer," Gru said with a shrug, "Eet was not put back very accurately, although eet usually does look beeger on de horizon."

"You can see all the dark spots really clearly."

"Seas, dey are seas… or de luna maria. Early on dey were thought 'ave water en dem…really dey were formed by volcanoes a long time ago."

"You know a lot about the moon, huh? I saw all of your books," Ady said.

"Mhmm," he leaned a little nearer to Ady and extended his hand to the moon, outlining on of the tiny shapes on the durface with his slender finger, "de beegest dark area dere on de edge ees de Ocean of Storms, and eef you go north from dere, dat ees de sea of rain," he moved his hand as he spoke. Ady moved her eye from the moon to him and smiled a little. "Beside dat ees de sea of serenity and right below ees de sea of tranquility…dat ees where de Apollo 11 landed."

He met her gaze with some awkwardness.

"What?" He said with some suspicion.

"Nothing," Ady said as she nearly ran a hand through her hair and then stopped before accidentally sending the wreath to the ground. "I should get my stuff and get going. I'll see you later Gru," she added before surprising him by giving him a quick, slightly awkward kiss on the cheek and heading in his house to get her groceries.

XXX

Yeaahhh, I know it's late again and I'm sorry. I got sidetracked by a sinus infection and my birthday…one was good…the other not so much. I hope this chapter turned out all right, I've kind of been gradually working on it for a while and can no longer tell if I like everything. I wanted to get this finished and posted before I headed over to the bfs, he's making me a birthday dinner. Have a pleasant evening everyone!

Liloapril: Hehe, yeah I don't think Gru would ever be very good at being normal. Glad to hear you're enjoying it. Hopefully this chapter turned out okay as well :)


	7. Author

Author's Note:

So…question. I've been meaning to continue this story for a while now, but haven't really gotten around to it because I have a full time job and a crap ton of stuff I'm doing on the side as well. Then lately there's been a new problem. Sequel.

For the last year or so I've thought; If I finish this it has to be before the sequel comes out because that's probably just going to mess with the timeline of my fic. The new trailer especially adds to my concern.

If I do continue the story, I basically have to ignore the sequel completely.

Anyways, here's my question; do you guys still want the rest of the story, even if it ignores the sequel? There's always the chance that it won't mess with my plot and facts too bad…but I doubt it. Up to you. If I do continue, the sequel's probably not going to be taken into account at all.

Let me know. :)


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